You can look at homeschooling in one of two ways: homeschooling is too stressful or homeschooling is a privilege.
With the majority of families needing two incomes today, it would be difficult to argue that homeschool is not a privilege. It is precisely that.
Most women have to go to work every day, whether they like it or not. Many would rather stay home with their children and some working moms would even love to homeschool.
If you can give your children a good solid homeschooled education, then this is a privilege one has to be grateful for.
You may feel you have too much to do, you may feel you can't do it all, but you are amongst the lucky parents who CAN homeschool.
And trust me, you can be a supermom! You can do it all. When it comes to homeschooling, you can have your cake and you can eat it too.
You might not have your mornings free, but you do get your cake in the way of well-raised children. And that's a lifetime investment that no amount of free time spent socializing or pursuing other interests can ever replace.
I talk to a lot of parents, and I can assure you first-hand that many want to stay home, but they can't. There are those unfortunate moms, too, who want to homeschool but their husbands don’t want them to.
But you have got both working in your favor and that puts you amongst the lucky or the blessed, however you want to look at it.
5 Reasons Why What I Say Is True
1) You have a choice to homeschool and having a choice is a privilege.
Again, not all parents have this choice. The majority of parents today rely on two incomes to keep a roof over their heads. And you are someone who is in the desirable position of being able to make this choice.
2) Your children will espouse your values and beliefs.
Much of what is difficult in the modern world is that there are so many varied beliefs. It seems that each new generation going through the public school system is removed from our historical tradition by another degree.
Think about it: for as far back as we can remember people believed in God, they believed in the sanctity of a marriage between a man and a woman, and they believed that how you raised and educated your child was your business—"full stop"—as the English say.
When you have a generation of children who don't share the values and beliefs of their parents and grandparents, you begin to see a breakdown in the cohesion of the family.
You can't run a business if everyone working for the business has a different vision, any more than you can find a strong solid family where every member has a different belief, especially when they are conflicting beliefs.
Friendship is founded upon common understandings and interests. When your children are grown, if you've raised them well and if life hasn’t thrown you any major wrenches, they should become your friends, as you will be theirs. Implied in this is a common understanding and belief system.
One can learn to tolerate another's ways, but you can't build true friendship on a core of toleration.
3) You have less chance of becoming senile in old age when you homeschool.
Like the physical body, the brain needs proper nourishment, proper sleep, and exercise to stay healthy, but it also needs to be used. When I say "exercise" I mean physical exercise, and when I say "used" I mean that we need to use our minds to think, learn, and discover new things.
Mother's naturally do a lot of multi-tasking because we are pulled in so many directions at once, and there is nothing more damaging to the memory—short of technology use—than multi-tasking.
When we are continually flitting from this child to that child, from these dishes to that ringing telephone, and from this mess to that mess, it's hard to get things into our short-term memories let alone our long-term memories.
You find yourself walking from one room to another only to arrive and wonder, "What on earth was I looking for!"
But homeschooling is an excellent antidote to this because you have to THINK a lot. Unless you are like a 19th century Renaissance man or woman, you probably had an anemic education; so you too will learn alongside your children.
Your mind is very active while homeschooling. You are studying material you've never learned before, you are working every day with your children, and your brain is doing a lot of ballet splits. You are stretching it to places it's never reached before.
Fast forward ten years and you've now raised fascinating children who question just about everything, and who have a lot of opinions.
Your homeschooled children are used to thinking about and discussing ideas.
You cannot stop studying now, however, because you will have to keep up with the conversation of your adult children, and the only way to do this is to keep learning!
I'm being somewhat facetious here, but not entirely because it is true. Hopefully, though, you will have learned to love learning for its own sake during your homeschooling journey, and you will continue to pursue knowledge and truth unto your dying day.
4) The "old folk's" home is less likely to be your destination when you homeschool.
Your bond with your children will be much stronger when you homeschool making you less likely to end up in a rest home later. It's only natural this would be so because bonds form and strengthen when we share experiences with others.
We share a lot more experiences with our children when we homeschool than we do when we put them into school for eight hours a day, and when they spend three more hours in the evening chained to their homework.
They will also have a stronger bond with their siblings and an overall sense of family loyalty.
(Not all parents in rest homes are abandoned by their children, but enough are to make it worth mentioning here.)
There are no studies to prove this, but I bet there will be one day. The headlines will read something like:
"Homeschooled Children Less Likely to Put Parents in Rest Homes"
5) You get to lie in bed with a good book.
My fifth reason may sound sacrilegious and irresponsible, but, truthfully, there were some homeschooling days when I'd have a leisurely morning, and I would conscientiously count my blessings for not having to do the "9 to 5" thing.
No scrambling to get kids clothed, fed, and in the car before you've got your hair brushed and your make-up on; no missed breakfasts and subsequently famished mornings; no tortuously long days and short nights; no comatose evenings having to deal with a houseful of children who need you when you'd rather bury your head in a pillow.
In spite of all the "stress" you believe homeschooling brings with it, the opposite is true.
We’ve got it much easier than our “schooled” counterparts. Our stress as homeschoolers is self-induced by worrying about things we don’t need to worry about.
Have we spent enough time on this lesson and are we going to have enough time to finish that lesson? Are we smart enough, learned enough, competent enough?
If you are one of those stressed-out homeschoolers, you must ignore the whisperings and practice conscientiously enjoying your days of privilege.
You're amongst the lucky few who will not have to answer to a 9 to 5 boss, who will not end up in a rest home, who will not develop dementia; but who will have a great relationship with their kids, and who will be able to savor a cup of coffee and a good book a little longer than she (or he) should.
But not every day, on the last point, that is.
P. S. I’ve put together a short podcast to help you have less stressful “mom” moments, and to help you get through them faster when you do: A Short Meditation on Raising Children.
To join my upcoming course How to Prepare Your Child for Excellence: the first seven years, please join the waiting list to be notified first. The course will begin November 3, 2018.
If you need help with homeschooling before then, you can schedule a one-hour consultation with me (that's usually all you'll need) http://bit.ly/2GJAZEr