Don't Teach Your Children About Diversity!

One of the beauties of homeschooling is that we can protect our children from political agendas that don't serve mankind, and the diversity issue may be one of them.

It mirrors the old military strategy of Julius Caesar's, "divide and conquer."

And Julius Caesar was no dummy.

So why is diversity the wrong conversation to have with your children? The best illustration for arguing against a topic which has divided so many of us is the example of my mother. 

My mother was different from the social-justice warriors you hear about today. An original warrior, she never preached to anyone, she wasn't spouting angry rhetoric about perceived wrongs, she never felt better than you or me because of the services she did; she just helped where she saw that people needed help.

When I was a young child, my mother was very active in the Civil Rights Movement, a violent and bloody time in America. Despite the dangers, she relentlessly marched with the oppressed in their struggle for equality, more worried about their safety than she was her own.

The World Encyclopedia even included a picture of her and my sister Kathleen, who had both flown across the country to demonstrate with hundreds of other people in the historic march on Selma, Alabama, led by Martin Luther King, Jr., in 1965.

My mother is on the left, my sister is holding the sign.

As I became a young woman, my mother, who was now middle-aged, served on the board for the homeless people where she listened to their stories, helped them get shelter, and assisted people in getting back on their feet.

She said to me once that homeless people weren't the bums others thought they were; they were usually people who'd had some hardship in life with no one to fall back on for support, and they'd ended up on the streets. 

Her heart always went out to the underserved amongst us.

When I hit my middle-ages, my mother, who was now an old woman, served as a volunteer teaching the Hispanic community English. She did that until she became ill at the age of ninety. 

To my mother, each life mattered because each life contained a human heart and that human heart possessed inherent dignity and worth. That was the ideal my mother embodied and lived by.

Color, religion, race; those weren't labels she understood.

She recognized that we all suffer the loss of loved ones, we all worry about our children, most of us struggle with our siblings, some of us wonder if God exists and many of us question why so much killing and suffering happens in the name of religion.  

There’s more sameness in us than there is difference.

The Diversity Rhetoric Questioned

Some years back, after my mother passed away, I had a series of experiences which led me to question the new diversity rhetoric that had emerged, such as the time I was asked to give a talk on education to a group of mothers from varying backgrounds. 

In defense of diversity, a woman of color felt it her duty to ask me why I only promoted books written by white people. Well, I don't, I explained. I promote books for the quality of the writing and content, not because of the skin color of the author. 

Out beyond ideas of wrongdoing and rightdoing, there is a field. I’ll meet you there.
— Rumi

The fact is that there are only six canons of great literature in the world and one of them belongs to the West.

I had wanted to introduce these women to our body of great books for children—not all of whom were written by white people—but this particular mom could only see the color of my skin and what she thought was the color of the authors' skin. 

Another experience was with a friend who espoused diversity ideals. When Trump became president, this particular friend of mine from an Eastern country grew livid and said to me,  "The white people have shown their true colors!" 

I had never seen my friend in terms of her skin color, yet she had just revealed that that was exactly how she saw me. I was her "white" friend and now my people had shown their true colors. 

But the experience that took the cake was when an academic corrected me after I objected to the racism of a certain "movement"  which  was in vogue at the time. 

She informed me that I could not accuse other people of being racist because I was white and only white people were racist. Her lack of logical reasoning dumbfounded me.

When you have lived in many different countries, as I have, you learn about  different cultures and different ways of viewing the world. I can tell you first-hand that I have never met a people who did not think they were better than another people.

In every country I’ve lived in, there’s always been the majority group who believed they were better than the minority group or they were better than the people of a neighboring country.

And then there's the individuals; us. Have you ever known an individual who did not express a judgement on another individual, either verbally or by inference?

We expose our petty, self-righteous arrogance every day; she gossips too much, he's too ambitious, he's too materialistic, she's too bossy. 

Whatever they is, we is above it, right?

We’re all islands shouting lies to each other across seas of misunderstanding.
— Rudyard Kipling

We all contain seeds of the virtues in our hearts such as compassion, generosity, temperance.

However, our hearts also contain seeds of the vices, such as envy, anger, greed.

But the crowning vice is arrogance, and some of us cultivate the roots of it more than we like to admit, even to ourselves.

Yet, what is racism, if not arrogance?

The Danger of the Group

There are a lot of diverse groups in America and they largely stick to their own kind. Maybe it's a kind of religion; or a kind of race, or a kind of political ideology, but "groups" tend to keep to their own, which makes sense because, after all, they are groups.

But there is something dangerous about  a clustering of kind when we base our identity on the "group" we belong to and see people outside of the "group" as the "other."

Barbara Coloroso, a parenting expert who had studied the genocide in Rwanda, said that the seeds of  genocide take root when we objectify a group of people as "other."

Rather than see them as fellow human beings traveling with us through the journey of life, we see them as "different" from us. 

And that's the crux of the matter. When we teach about diversity, we are teaching about differences, we are teaching about the "other."

If we allow our identity to be based on the identity of a particular  group  instead of our shared humanity, we lose sight of the inward bonds of our collective hearts. 

If we have no peace, it is because we have forgotten that we belong to each other.
— Mother Teresa

It's not that we can't be a member in a group, but let's not be of the group. And if we have to identify with a group, then let's identify with the group of human beings who shed tears of joy and sorrow for all the same things.

That was the group to which my mother belonged.

Instead of teaching our children about our differences, I'm suggesting we raise our children to focus on our samenesses.

Genocide is genocide; it doesn't matter who is committing it or who it's being committed against. 

When it comes to the innocent slaughter of women and children; regardless of their race, religion, or color, who are we being if we don't stand on the side of mercy?

Who are we when we raise our children to think in terms of "otherness" instead of the common bond of the human heart?

When we dismiss a child's book, not on whether or not the book is worth reading, but because of the skin color of the authors, haven't we ourselves nurtured the seed of genocide?

Upcoming FREE Masterclass! Discover 3 Homeschooling Mistakes No One Tells You About
with Liz Hanson

Don’t miss our free download, Ten Books Every Well-Educated Child Should Read.

When you join the Smart Homeschooler Academy online course for parents, Liz will share her 6-step framework, so you can raise children of higher intelligence, critical thinking, and of good character.

As a homeschooler, you will never have to worry about failing your children, because working with Liz, you will feel confident, calm, and motivated; as she guides you to train your children’s minds and nurture their characters.

Teach your child to read before sending him to school! Learn more about Elizabeth's unique course, How to Teach Your Child to Read and Raise a Child Who Loves to Read.

For parents of children under age seven who would like to prepare their child for social and academic success, please begin with Elizabeth’s singular online course, Raise Your Child to Thrive in Life and Excel in Learning.

Elizabeth Y. Hanson is a homeschooling thought-leader and the founder of Smart Homeschooler.

As an Educator, Homeschool Emerita, Writer, and Love and Leadership Certified Parenting Coach, she has 21+ years of experience working in education.

Developing a comprehensive understanding of how to raise and educate a child, based on tradition and modern research, and she devotes her time to helping parents to get it right.

Elizabeth is available for one-on-one consultations as needed.

"I know Elizabeth Y. Hanson as a remarkably intelligent, highly sensitive woman with a moral nature and deep insight into differences between schooling and education. Elizabeth's mastery of current educational difficulties is a testimony to her comprehensive understanding of the competing worlds of schooling and education. She has a good heart and a good head. What more can I say?”

John Taylor Gatto Distinguished educator, public speaker, and best-selling author of Dumbing Us Down: The Hidden Curriculum of Compulsory Schooling

Don't Homeschool If Your Children Have This One Bad Habit!

The most frequent complaint I get from homeschooling moms is that their children don't listen to them. It's more than just a complaint  because  for a homeschooling mom, not listening is a serious issue.

Children who don't listen, won't obey and children who don't obey, won't get their work done. Which means that you, the homeschooling parent, will struggle  to do your job well. 

The essence of successful discipline is not technique; rather, it is self-confidence.
— John Rosemond, author, A Family of Value

However, I am not suggesting that you put your children into school; but only to train them to listen before you continue homeschooling. After all, the skill of listening is a vital skill and one children must be taught.

An Effective Approach

The most effective approach would be to stop homeschooling for a short period until you get your relationship back on course with your children. 

The reason for this is because the frustration everyone is feeling from the tug of war around studying is probably causing a lot of tension, and your children may develop a negative association with homeschooling if it continues. 

Once your children decide that homeschooling is no fun, instead of one problem, you’ve now got two. So a break is the best strategy for this situation.

But rather than announce you are putting homeschooling on hold until they learn to obey,  announce that next week will be a homeschool break week. You don't need to offer any reason other than, "Because I said so!". 

The Crux of the Matter

Now, you can focus on the issue which, at the core, is a problem of disrespect. Like most parents in the West, your children are not showing you the respect you deserve. 

It's a societal problem for various reasons including, but not limited to, the negative influences on children via multi-media and technology, as well as the push for modern parenting practices that sound great in theory but haven’t worked. 

While there are multiple strategies that should be employed in your efforts to correct your relationship with your children, we'll focus on the primary tactic of assuming the role of leadership.

As two captains will sink a ship, you and your spouse will have to show up as one. In other words, you have one voice. What one says, the other supports, at least in front of the children. Any disagreements you have regarding your children, must be discussed privately.

Successful Parenting Traits

It's critical to understand the traits of successful parents, so you can learn to imitate them until they become your traits, too.

Successful parenting leadership…

  • They are decisive

  • They communicate clear expectations

  • They hold their children accountable

  • They assume authority (not to be confused with "authoritarian")

  • They set clear boundaries

  • They give their children age-appropriate responsibilities

  • They do not bend down to their children's level; they let their children look up to them

If this list sounds too authoritarian, it may be in comparison to the modern advice you've probably been given. 

The question to ask yourself is, how's that working?

Your children need to see you as the authority, someone worthy of respect, someone they can trust to keep their word, and a role model they can emulate.

You want to be a good influence for your children, so you can guide them towards developing good character and excelling in your homeschool. Like us, they won't emulate someone they do not respect. 

The more attention you pay to your child, the less attention he will pay to you.
— John Rosemond

Once you have successfully established your boundaries by assuming the role of leader, your children will listen and obey you and homeschooling will be more fun and fruitful. 

Effective parenting leadership must include unconditional  love, but I know you have that part covered. 

Don’t miss our free download, Ten Books Every Well-Educated Child Should Read.

When you join the Smart Homeschooler Academy online course for parents, Liz will share her 6-step framework, so you can raise children of higher intelligence, critical thinking, and of good character.

As a homeschooler, you will never have to worry about failing your children, because working with Liz, you will feel confident, calm, and motivated; as she guides you to train your children’s minds and nurture their characters.

Teach your child to read before sending him to school! Learn more about Elizabeth's unique course, How to Teach Your Child to Read and Raise a Child Who Loves to Read.

For parents of children under age seven who would like to prepare their child for social and academic success, please begin with Elizabeth’s singular online course, Raise Your Child to Thrive in Life and Excel in Learning.

Elizabeth Y. Hanson is a homeschooling thought-leader and the founder of Smart Homeschooler.

As an Educator, Homeschool Emerita, Writer, and Love and Leadership Certified Parenting Coach, she has 21+ years of experience working in education.

Developing a comprehensive understanding of how to raise and educate a child, based on tradition and modern research, and she devotes her time to helping parents to get it right.

Elizabeth is available for one-on-one consultations as needed.

"I know Elizabeth Y. Hanson as a remarkably intelligent, highly sensitive woman with a moral nature and deep insight into differences between schooling and education. Elizabeth's mastery of current educational difficulties is a testimony to her comprehensive understanding of the competing worlds of schooling and education. She has a good heart and a good head. What more can I say?”

John Taylor Gatto Distinguished educator, public speaker, and best-selling author of Dumbing Us Down: The Hidden Curriculum of Compulsory Schooling

The Six Purposes of Schooling by John Taylor Gatto

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When people ask me why I homeschooled, I tell them I had no choice. If they knew what I knew about public education, they would homeschool too.

John Taylor Gatto was the man who opened my eyes to the nefarious agenda behind institutionalized schooling. What follows is a transcription of the key section from John’s classic speech and opus, The Underground History of American Education.

John was a brilliant and well-researched man. I have read what is below in Ingles’ book myself; it is all true.   

Transcription of John’s Talk

“I have something here.  I have the six purposes of schooling [from the book Principles of Secondary Education by Alexander James Inglis] as laid down in 1917 by the man whom Harvard named their Honor Lecture in Education for. 

So far from being a fringe individual, this guy is the reason the Harvard Honor Lecture in Education is named as it is:  The Inglis Lecture.  I would like to read you the six purposes of schooling.  I moved heaven and earth as it took years to find this book [Principles of Secondary Education]--just like trying to find in past years a copy of the Carol Quigley [book] Tragedy and Hope.  

I learned about Inglis from a twenty year President of Harvard [1933-1953], James Bryant Conant, who was a poison gas specialist in World War I--and was in the very inner circle of the Atomic Bomb Project in World War II--was High Commissioner of Occupied Germany after the War. 

So he [James Bryant Conant] wrote--there must be 20 books about the institution of schooling--of which he was completely a proponent.  And he is a very, very bad writer.  I forced myself to read most of these books, and one of them he says that if you really want to know what school is about, you need to pick up the book that I’m referring to Principles of Secondary Education

Two years it took me to find a copy of the book [Principles of Secondary Education by Alexander James Inglis]--750 pages, tiny print and as dull as your imagination can be.  And furthermore, it is not till you get to the very middle of the book--in an unlabelled section--that he spills the beans.  Let me spill them for you.  

 There are six purposes, or functions, as he calls them.  The first he [Alexander Inglis] calls the Adjustive Function: Schools are to establish fixed habits of reaction to authority.  That’s their main purpose--habits and reactions to authority. 

That is why school authorities don’t tear their hair out when somebody exposes that the Atomic Bomb wasn’t dropped on Korea, as a history book in the 1990s printed by Scott Foresman [did], and why each of these books has hundreds of substantive errors.  Learning isn’t the reason the texts are distributed.  

The Adjustive Function

So, first is the Adjustive Function--fixed habits.  Now here comes the wonderful insight that being able to analyze the detail will give you.  How can you establish whether someone has successfully developed this Automatic Reaction because people have a proclivity when they are given sensible orders to follow. 

That is not what they want to teach.  The only way you can measure this is to give stupid orders and people automatically follow those.  Now you have achieved Function #1.  

The Integrating Function

Have you ever ever wondered why some of the foolish things that schools do or allow to continue?  [Function] #2, he [Inglis] calls it the Integrating Function, but it is easier to understand if you call it the Conformity Function. 

It’s to make children alike as possible--the gifted children and the stupid--alike as possible because market research uses statistical sampling, and it only works if people react generally the same way.  

The Directive Function

The Third Function he calls the Directive Function: School is to diagnose your proper social role and then log the evidence that here is where you are on the Great Pyramid, so that future people won’t allow you to escape that compartment.  

The Differentiating Function

 The Fourth Function is the Differentiating Function.  Because once you have diagnosed the kids in this layer, you do not want them to learn anything that the higher layers are learning.  So you teach just as far as the requirement of that layer.  

The Selective Function

 Number five and six are the creepiest of all!  Number 5 is the Selective Function.  What that means is what Darwin meant by natural selection: You are assessing the breeding quality of each individual kid.  You’re doing it structurally because school teachers don’t know this is happening. 

And you’re trying to use ways to prevent the poor stuff from breeding.  And those ways are hanging labels--humiliating labels--around their neck, encouraging the shallowness of thinking.

 I often wondered, because I came from a very very strict Scotish-Irish culture that never allowed you to leer at a girl.  But when I got to NYC, the boys were pawing the girls openly and there was no redress for the girls at all, except not showing up in the classroom--high absentee rates. 

Well, you are supposed to teach structurally that sexual pleasure is what you withdraw from a relationship and everything else is a waste of time and expensive.  

 So, the Selective Function is what Darwin meant by the favored races.  The idea is to consciously improve the breeding stock.  Schools are meant to tag the unfit with their inferiority by poor grades, remedial placement, and humiliation, so that their peers will accept them as inferior.  And the good breeding stock among the females will reject them as possible partners.  

The Propaedeutic Function

 And the Sixth is the creepiest of all! And I think it is partly what Tragedy and Hope is about--a fancy Roman name, the Propaedeutic Function.  Because as early as Roman bigtime thinkers, it was understood that to continue a social form required that some people be trained that they were the custodians of this.  So, some small fraction of the kids are being ready to take over the project. 

That’s the guy--the honor lecturer [Inglis], and it will not surprise you that his ancestors include the major-general of the siege of the Luknow of India--famous for tying the mutineers’ on the muzzle of the cannons and blowing them apart, or somebody who was forced to flee NYC, a churchman at the beginning of the American Revolution, because he wrote a refutation of Thomas Paine’s Common Sense. 

They were going to tar and feather him.  He fled and was rewarded by the British by making him the Bishop of Nova Scotia.  Those are Inglis’ ancestors!  

 So, Al Inglis is certainly--when I learned of this and wrote to Harvard, asking for access to the Inglis Lecture.  Strike me dead, Lord, if I’m exaggerating at all.  I was told “We have no Inglis Lecture--hasn’t been for years, and we have no records. 

It was the same that happened when I discovered that Elwood B. Cubberly, the most influential schoolman of the 20th century and the bionomics genius had been the elementary school editor of Houghton Mifflin, and I wrote Houghton Mifflin--Is there any record? And they said, “We have no record of anyone named Elwood P. Cubberly. 

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Now Harvard is telling me, “There is no Inglis Lecture.  A week passed and I got a call from Harvard, from some obscure office at Harvard, saying “What is your interest in the Ingles Lecture?”  I knew that I was on thin ice. 

And I said, “Well, James Conant referred me in his books to the man the Inglis Lecture is named after, and I was just wondering if I could get some background on this fellow, and a list of the lectures.  

 And in due time, I got a list of the lectures and instructions [on] how to access the texts, but not easily. Enough hoops that someone who has to mow the lawn and burp the baby wouldn’t jump through those hoops.  I was able to prove Harper’s [magazine] wouldn’t publish [it in] the cover essay I wrote, which Lew Laflin [?] named Against School, but I had called The Artificial Extension of Childhood because I think that is the key mechanism at work here.  

 So, they wouldn’t print the information about Cubberley because Houghton Mifflin denied it.  It was only months after that I looked through my extensive library of incredibly dull books about schooling, and I opened [one]--and on the facing page said Elwood B. Cubberly, Editor and Chief of Elementary School, publishing arm of Houghton Mifflin. 

By the way, the secondary Editor and Chief was Alexander Ingles.  So you see how this cousinage works.” 

*****

*Video transcribed by Roger Copple. To watch the full 12-minute video: The Six Purposes of Schooling [Video]

Don’t miss our free download, Ten Books Every Well-Educated Child Should Read.

When you join the Smart Homeschooler Academy online course for parents, Liz will share her 6-step framework, so you can raise children of higher intelligence, critical thinking, and of good character.

As a homeschooler, you will never have to worry about failing your children, because working with Liz, you will feel confident, calm, and motivated; as she guides you to train your children’s minds and nurture their characters.

Teach your child to read before sending him to school! Learn more about Elizabeth's unique course, How to Teach Your Child to Read and Raise a Child Who Loves to Read.

For parents of children under age seven who would like to prepare their child for social and academic success, please begin with Elizabeth’s singular online course, Raise Your Child to Thrive in Life and Excel in Learning.

Elizabeth Y. Hanson is a homeschooling thought-leader and the founder of Smart Homeschooler.

As an Educator, Homeschool Emerita, Writer, and Love and Leadership Certified Parenting Coach, she has 21+ years of experience working in education.

Developing a comprehensive understanding of how to raise and educate a child, based on tradition and modern research, and she devotes her time to helping parents to get it right.

Elizabeth is available for one-on-one consultations as needed.

"I know Elizabeth Y. Hanson as a remarkably intelligent, highly sensitive woman with a moral nature and deep insight into differences between schooling and education. Elizabeth's mastery of current educational difficulties is a testimony to her comprehensive understanding of the competing worlds of schooling and education. She has a good heart and a good head. What more can I say?”

John Taylor Gatto Distinguished educator, public speaker, and best-selling author of Dumbing Us Down: The Hidden Curriculum of Compulsory Schooling

5 Rules of Handling Books for Civilized Children

When I was younger, I had a friend who was a writer and one day he saw me put a book face down on the table. 

"Oh, horrors!" he exclaimed. "If you knew what went into writing a book, you would never treat it that way." (He was much older and a bit of a Henry Higgins character.)

Will you be surprised if I tell you that in all my years since, I have never once put a book face down on anything. 

Good friends, good books, and a sleepy conscience: this is the ideal life.
— Mark Twain

Books contain the workings of an individual's mind, and ideas, as Aristotle taught, have a divine component to them. I was fortunate that, at a relatively young age, I was taught to respect the written word, something our youth are failing to discover. 

Consider for a moment the origin of new ideas, insights, and understandings and you will begin to get a sense of the wonder of the mind.

And when you grasp that sense, and you consider that an intelligently-written book encapsulates that wonder, you will better understand my 5 rules for treating books with respect. 

5 Rules for  Handling a Book

1. Never Eat While Reading

Have you ever bought a used book only to find a blob of someone's ice cream or chocolate  inside the pages? Talk about horrors. Eating while reading is not a good habit for two reasons: 

  1. Eating without paying attention to what you are eating can contribute to obesity. It's very easy to lose sight of how much we have eaten, when  we are putting food into your mouth mindlessly. With the obesity epidemic in the West, this is a habit we do not want to inculcate in our children.

  2.  Books, like clothes, should be kept clean. I can think of no better reason than when one eats, one should eat, and when one reads, one should read. Furthermore, it was once considered poor manners to eat while reading, and I maintain that it still is. 

2. Always Use a Bookmarker

You will be hard-pressed to find a book in my home without a bookmarker in it. My books are adorned with anything from a scrap of paper (not recommended) to gold-plated bookmarkers (not real gold). 

You should never let your child bend the top of the page to remember where he left off! If you go into a used bookstore, as I often do, you'll notice that older books are devoid of bent pages. This is because people of earlier generations were more civilized and knew how to treat a book. 

The person, be it a gentleman or lady, who had no pleasure in a good novel, must be intolerably stupid.
— Jane Austen

3. Never Use a Highlighter

Have you ever come across a difficult-to-find used book only to discover that it had been marked up with yellow highlights? Pages full of yellow highlights in a book tell me only one thing, the previous reader never learned how to extract the main point from a passage. 

Another abominable habit is to mark up a book in messy scribbles with ink. A neatly written note on the margin, or even a checkmark by the noteworthy passage is plenty,and a sharpened pencil is the preferred instrument.

4. Treat the Book Cover with Care

I never leave home without a book, and I would teach your children to do the same. We never know if we will get stuck in a long line, staring at the walls (or worse, some unsightly person with rings in his nose, purple-spiked hair, and trousers down to his knees) while we wait for the time to pass.

Invariably, when I forget to bring a book with me, that's the day I get stuck in the long line. It's as if the Universe is reminding me of the importance of this habit. 

Back to my point, before I put my book in my purse, I wrap it up in a very thin book bag. If your child has a backpack, he’ll want to do the same. This way, neither the cover nor the pages will lose the beauty of their form.

If I can't find my book bag, I might wrap it in a scarf; anything of light material will do as long as it will hold the book in place and not weigh down my purse.

In a child’s case, overloaded backpacks can cause back problems, so you’ll want to make sure his bag is not too heavy either.

5. Travel with Care

When I travel, I wrap my books up before I place them in my suitcase. There is nothing more shattering than arriving at my destination only to find my books have been tossed about like a ship caught in a tempest. 

And that, dear reader, completes my 5 rules for handling a book with respect. 

Now, let me tell you about another writer friend who I will never understand. His bookshelves are full of well-read books with food stains, bent pages, torn covers, and all the horrors you can possibly imagine.

He's like a gardener  who creates beautiful gardens for others to enjoy, but tramples on his own. 

I realize, like my friend, you may object to my 5 rules for handling a book, but I can only defend myself by saying that obesity and pages spotted with chocolate are aesthetically unpleasing to the eye, and we should always strive to uphold that which is beautiful.

Don’t miss our free download, Ten Books Every Well-Educated Child Should Read.

When you join the Smart Homeschooler Academy online course for parents, Liz will share her 6-step framework, so you can raise children of higher intelligence, critical thinking, and of good character.

As a homeschooler, you will never have to worry about failing your children, because working with Liz, you will feel confident, calm, and motivated; as she guides you to train your children’s minds and nurture their characters.

Teach your child to read before sending him to school! Learn more about Elizabeth's unique course, How to Teach Your Child to Read and Raise a Child Who Loves to Read.

For parents of children under age seven who would like to prepare their child for social and academic success, please begin with Elizabeth’s singular online course, Raise Your Child to Thrive in Life and Excel in Learning.

Elizabeth Y. Hanson is a homeschooling thought-leader and the founder of Smart Homeschooler.

As an Educator, Homeschool Emerita, Writer, and Love and Leadership Certified Parenting Coach, she has 21+ years of experience working in education.

Developing a comprehensive understanding of how to raise and educate a child, based on tradition and modern research, and she devotes her time to helping parents to get it right.

Elizabeth is available for one-on-one consultations as needed.

"I know Elizabeth Y. Hanson as a remarkably intelligent, highly sensitive woman with a moral nature and deep insight into differences between schooling and education. Elizabeth's mastery of current educational difficulties is a testimony to her comprehensive understanding of the competing worlds of schooling and education. She has a good heart and a good head. What more can I say?”

John Taylor Gatto Distinguished educator, public speaker, and best-selling author of Dumbing Us Down: The Hidden Curriculum of Compulsory Schooling

Replacing Ritalin with Discipline Cures Chemical Imbalances in Children

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You may be worried that your unmanageable child has a chemical imbalance.

Or, maybe a teacher has gone as far as to suggest he should be evaluated for a behavioral disorder, such as ADHD.

What you are not told is that the cure for his difficult behavior may be as easy as a spoonful of discipline.

The Facts

According to John Rosemond, MS and Bose Ravenel, MD, "No studies to date have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that impulsivity and short attention span - the two primary symptoms of ADHD - result from physical problems or chemical imbalances in the brain."

The ADHD Establishment would be hard-pressed to explain how, of all the American cultural groups that share a common European heritage, only the Amish have managed to not become infected with the elusive ADHD gene.
— Rosemond and Ravenel

Rosemond and Ravenel wrote an entire book on the subject called The Diseasing of America's Children: Exposing the ADHD Fiasco and Empowering Parents to Take Back Control, in which they make a strong case for old-fashioned discipline. 

If you have a child who is suspect for one of the three primary behavior disorder diseases, namely ADHD, ODD, or EOBD*, it would be prudent to grab a copy of their book.

The Why

Have you ever wondered why before the progressive 1960's cultural revolution, we have no records of behavior disorders that weren't quickly eradicated by not sparing the rod?

Then, as if children had suddenly changed, behavior disorders as disease were added to the DSM manual. 

Now, instead of discipline, children are given medication for their behavior.

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We are neglecting to treat the real problem, which is that children are failing to grow up because we have lost the art of raising them well

The Problem

When little Susie throws a tantrum in the middle of the department store because she wants a toy, instead of grabbing little Susie by the hand, marching her out of the store, and plopping her into the back seat of your car to let her belt it out, what do we do? 

We try to talk some sense into her while shopping as she continues disturbing the peace.

We may even begin to bribe her with ice cream when she gets home if she promises to stop crying. We might even give her what she wants because we don't have the time or energy to deal with her behavior. 

When Johnny fails to focus long enough to follow our homework instructions or do some chores, what do we do? 

We begin to wonder if his lack of focus has a more sinister cause.

When Adam impulsively pushes his little sister or grabs a toy from another child, we begin to wonder, "Why is he so impulsive?

Could it be?"

These kind of children become prime candidates in school for being singled-out for a behavioral disorder diagnosis. The next step is to send the child for further evaluation. The psychiatrist or psychologist then notes in medical shorthand the following symptoms:

  • Short attention span

  • Lack of self-control; impulsive

  • Difficulty staying on task

  • Impatient

  • Tantrums

  • Easily frustrated

  • Defiant 

  • Irresponsible

The Oversight

What the psychiatrist or psychologist fails to recognize is that these are also the symptoms of a toddler's "terrible two" behavior.

According to Rosemond and Ravenel, the medical expert has failed to recognize the obvious.

As a consequence of the progressive parenting theories that began to surface in the 1960s, children no longer learn the rules of civil behavior lest we harm their self-esteem.

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The postmodern, non-theistic religion of self-esteem has spawned a host of problems for America’s children.
— Rosemond and Ravenel

Consequently, incompetent parenting is mistaken for a behavior disorder that requires medication.

Proving how inconclusive the studies around behavior disorders are, and the impossibility of diagnosing a "chemical imbalance," Rosemond and Ravenel encourage parents to ignore the pharmaceutical cry that something is wrong with their child and look to improve their parenting skills instead.

The Reality

Prior to the 1960’s, only 1 - 3% of the population were diagnosed with problems outside the range of normal. If your child is displaying terrible two symptoms beyond the age of the terrible two's, save yourself the time and expense by self-diagnosing the problem for what it is: lax parenting. 

Teach your child good manners and the code of civil conduct, and you'll see his behavior disorders miraculously disappear. A good place to start is with “please” and “thank you.”

“Look at me when I speak to you and listen,” is also good.

And, "Go to your room until you can behave," never failed anyone.

*Disclaimer: You are the best judge of your child. If you think there is a medical issue, seek medical help. But if you suspect lax parenting is at the root of your child’s behavior, then learning to lead your child with love and authority is where you want to start.

Don’t miss our free download, Ten Books Every Well-Educated Child Should Read.

When you join the Smart Homeschooler Academy online course for parents, Liz will share her 6-step framework, so you can raise children of higher intelligence, critical thinking, and of good character.

As a homeschooler, you will never have to worry about failing your children, because working with Liz, you will feel confident, calm, and motivated; as she guides you to train your children’s minds and nurture their characters.

Teach your child to read before sending him to school! Learn more about Elizabeth's unique course, How to Teach Your Child to Read and Raise a Child Who Loves to Read.

For parents of children under age seven who would like to prepare their child for social and academic success, please begin with Elizabeth’s singular online course, Raise Your Child to Thrive in Life and Excel in Learning.

Elizabeth Y. Hanson is a homeschooling thought-leader and the founder of Smart Homeschooler.

As an Educator, Homeschool Emerita, Writer, and Love and Leadership Certified Parenting Coach, she has 21+ years of experience working in education.

Developing a comprehensive understanding of how to raise and educate a child, based on tradition and modern research, and she devotes her time to helping parents to get it right.

Elizabeth is available for one-on-one consultations as needed.

"I know Elizabeth Y. Hanson as a remarkably intelligent, highly sensitive woman with a moral nature and deep insight into differences between schooling and education. Elizabeth's mastery of current educational difficulties is a testimony to her comprehensive understanding of the competing worlds of schooling and education. She has a good heart and a good head. What more can I say?”

John Taylor Gatto Distinguished educator, public speaker, and best-selling author of Dumbing Us Down: The Hidden Curriculum of Compulsory Schooling

A History Lesson For Your Kids on Valentine's Day

Valentine's Day is a celebration of love, but it wasn’t always that way.

Early History

On the contrary, it began as a holiday to honor the martyred Christian saint, St. Valentine; and the celebration of St. Valentine dates back to the early Roman Empire!

However, there was more than one saint named St. Valentine, so it is unknown which St. Valentine our holiday is named after.

There are various reasons for our unknown St. Valentine's martyrdom, too. There was one St. Valentine, who was martyred under the law of the Roman Emperor Aurelius in 273 a.d. for illegally helping Christians escape persecution.

For centuries there was discord between the early Roman Empire and Christianity and even amongst various sects of Christianity within the Roman Empire.

The Love Connection

The "love" connection to St. Valentine's Day possibly came from the unconditional love for Christ making one willing to die a martyr. The aforementioned St. Valentine would fit into this category.

A tradition existed throughout the Empire of dedicating certain calendar days to the martyred saints, and on their allotted day, each saint would be celebrated and remembered.

But there were so many martyred saints that by the time we reached the Middle Ages, there were enough saint holidays to fill every day of the year!

First Record

St. Valentine's Day, as we know it, is first recorded as occurring on February 14th, as far back as the 8th century.

The supposition is that the influence of the "courtly" love of the Middle Ages, and the early spring mating of lovebirds, eventually morphed into a holiday for lovebirds.

Love looks not with the eyes, but with the mind, and therefore is winged Cupid painted blind.
— William. Shakespeare

England, of All Places

During the 18th century, in England, St. Valentine's Day became designated for people to express their love. You may hear some people say things like, "It's just another Hallmark holiday created to make money."

But the celebration of Valentine's Day for lovebirds precedes Hallmark cards.

(However, the business became successful by introducing Valentine's Day and Christmas cards in the early part of the 20th century.)

Now considered more of a romantic holiday than a day to remember martyred saints, we still can find churches that continue to celebrate St. Valentine's Day as a proper saint's festival, including the Church of England.

Changing Dates Around

But like the Christians would do in the Middle Ages, the churches today have moved the saint's celebration from February 14th to another date for convenience.

A fun question to ask your children is whether or not it was right to change the Saint’s day to another day.

I’m sure they’ll come up with some amusing answers!

The Art Project

Now that your children know the evolution of Valentine's Day, why not encourage them to make Valentine's Day cards for the people they love?

If you have relatives who live out of town, they can even post their cards in the mail, serving as an act of kindness and a grammar lesson, too.

Handmade greeting cards are fun to make and so much more memorable than Hallmark cards.

Homeschool Planning

If you're homeschooling and your kids make Valentine's Day cards, you can check off history, grammar, and art lessons.

Who said learning couldn’t be fun?!

Another thing you could do is to make Valentine’s Day cookies and have your children deliver them to your neighbors as a gesture of goodwill.

Since baking includes math, you have also covered a math lesson too.

Happy Valentine's Day!

Upcoming FREE Webinar! How to Raise a Reader with Liz Hanson

Don’t miss our free download, Ten Books Every Well-Educated Child Should Read.

When you join the Smart Homeschooler Academy online course for parents, Liz will share her 6-step framework to raise children of higher intelligence, critical thinking, and of better character.

As a homeschooler, you will never have to worry about failing your children, because working with Liz, you will feel confident, calm, and motivated. She also provides you with the tools and support you need to homeschool successfully.

Teach your child to read before sending him to school! Learn more about Elizabeth's unique course, How to Teach Your Child to Read and Raise a Child Who Loves to Read.

For parents of children under age seven who would like to prepare their child for social and academic success, please begin with Elizabeth’s singular online course, Raise Your Child to Thrive in Life and Excel in Learning.

Elizabeth Y. Hanson is a homeschooling thought-leader and the founder of Smart Homeschooler.

As an Educator, Homeschool Emerita, Writer, and Love and Leadership Certified Parenting Coach, she has 21+ years of experience working in education.

Developing a comprehensive understanding of how to raise and educate a child, based on tradition and modern research, and she devotes her time to helping parents to get it right.

Elizabeth is available for one-on-one consultations as needed.

"I know Elizabeth Y. Hanson as a remarkably intelligent, highly sensitive woman with a moral nature and deep insight into differences between schooling and education. Elizabeth's mastery of current educational difficulties is a testimony to her comprehensive understanding of the competing worlds of schooling and education. She has a good heart and a good head. What more can I say?”

John Taylor Gatto Distinguished educator, public speaker, and best-selling author of Dumbing Us Down: The Hidden Curriculum of Compulsory Schooling

#1 Huge Mistake Parents Are Making

No parent would want to raise their child to be less intelligent than he could be.

Yet, every single day, around the world, parents are doing one critical thing that gets in the way of their children’s intellectual development. 

Their children are spending way too much time on screens. Whether it’s for educational purposes or simple entertainment, screens are screens. 

The Hard Facts

From one study by Hikaru Takeuchi, et al, “Excessive internet use is shown to be cross sectionally associated with lower cognitive functioning and reduced volume of several brain areas.

According to Common Sense Media’s latest research, 50% of teens report that they feel addicted to their phones while 59% of their parents say the teens are addicted.

That’s a lot of teens who are addicted to their phones.

The younger a child is, the more damaging technology is to the development of his brain. This is a hard fact of science.

Effects on the Growing Brain

Technology use in childhood interferes with the neural connections in the brain, and it is the neural connections that make up our intelligence. 

Logic would have it that the less neural connections a brain makes, the less intelligent an individual would become. 

We are seeing first-hand the evidence of the numbing effect technology has on children’s minds with a new generation of tech babies who have come of age.

There are so many studies reporting the ill effects of technology on the brains of children.

It cannot be argued otherwise unless you have billions of dollars and spread false propaganda to sell your products like the video game lobby does.

Video games alone pull in 300 billion dollars per year! The industry pays lobbyists to convince congressmen that video games are beneficial.

Inability to Focus and ADHD

We know that technology use interferes with our ability to focus. With so many children playing video games, and so many children diagnosed with ADHD, I wonder how much technology has to do with it?

Maybe instead of medicating our kids, we removed technology from their lives, they might learn to focus better. 

So many adults self-label themselves with ADHD when they don’t have ADHD. People say it so often that it’s become a euphemism for a lack of focus. 

The hard facts of the matter are that we’re spending too much time online. 

True Story

I spoke with a woman once who lost her son to technology. He became addicted as a teenager, and when he finally recovered, she said he was never the same kid.

She didn’t have a strong connection with him like she had with her other children, because the technology had damaged his brain. 

It was a heartbreaking story, and one that will be shared with more and more parents until we come to terms with the truth about technology.

We will serve our children best by getting rid of the gadgets. And be willing to deal with the complaints and the anger your kids will probably display for the first few weeks, because eventually, they’ll get over it. 

You don’t want to lose your kids to technology, as so many parents have. We now have a plethora of addiction centers for withdrawing from technology because the addiction is real.

And each child with a device is a potential victim. 

If you have your kids online for school, drop that too. Homeschooling offline is much easier, more rewarding, and more enjoyable. 

May we ditch the brain-draining, mind-numbing screens and provide our children with a more brain-activating, mind-developing experience instead.

Don’t miss our free downloadTen Books Every Well-Educated Child Should Read.

Teach your child to read before sending him to school! Learn more about Elizabeth's unique course, How to Teach Your Child to Read and Raise a Child Who Loves to Read.

For parents of children under age seven who would like to prepare their child for social and academic success, please begin with Elizabeth’s singular online course, Raise Your Child to Thrive in Life and Excel in Learning.

When you join the Smart Homeschooler Academy online course for parents, Elizabeth will make homeschooling manageable for you. She’ll guide you in helping your kids reach their intellectual potential and developing good character.

As a homeschooler, you will feel confident, calm, and motivated knowing you have the tools and support you need to homeschool successfully.

Elizabeth Y. Hanson is a homeschooling thought-leader and the founder of Smart Homeschooler.

As an Educator, Homeschool Emerita, Writer, and Love and Leadership Certified Parenting Coach, Elizabeth has 21+ years of experience working in education.

Developing a comprehensive understanding of how to raise and educate a child, she devotes her time to helping parents get it right.

Elizabeth is available for one-on-one consultations as needed.

"I know Elizabeth Y. Hanson as a remarkably intelligent, highly sensitive woman with a moral nature and deep insight into differences between schooling and education. Elizabeth's mastery of current educational difficulties is a testimony to her comprehensive understanding of the competing worlds of schooling and education. She has a good heart and a good head. What more can I say?”

John Taylor Gatto Distinguished educator, public speaker, and best-selling author of Dumbing Us Down: The Hidden Curriculum of Compulsory Schooling

4 Reasons Your Kids Should Skip Halloween This Year

I took my kids trick-or-treating on a few occasions, but the more I thought about the messages we were communicating to our kids, the more I began to think trick-or-treating might not be such a great idea.

Ironically, while growing up, Halloween was one of my favorite holidays. What kid doesn't like candy? Having a free-for-all candy night with no adult supervision was the equivalent of kid Heaven.

But now, I stand on the side of those who think we should ban Halloween.

#1 Health & Mixed Messages

Letting our children trick-or-treat contradicts our position that sugar is bad for their teeth and bad for them. We limit the sugar our children eat all year, but one day a year we give them a free rein to eat as much sugar as they want.

Do you have any idea how much sugar they consume? The average child consumes three cups of sugar on Halloween!

Eating Halloween candy is not limited to one night, either. For however long it takes them to get through their bag of candy, that's how many days they are filling their bodies with harmful amounts of sugar.

The gross amount of sugar consumption creates severe sugar spikes in our children's blood levels, leaving them feeling not so well.

Overeating candy comes with the underconsumption of wholesome foods, which only exacerbates the problem.

Allowing our children to trick or treat on Halloween and eat so much candy is not practicing what we preach, nor is it responsible parenting. I'm guilty too, but when the facts are on the table— wow.

I read that one dentist pays children $2.00 for every pound of Halloween candy they give him. While I can appreciate the intention behind this gesture, is it sending our kids the right message?

We buy the candy, the kids knock on our doors, we give them the candy, and then the kids sell it to the dentist.

How can turning our kids into greedy candy peddlers be a solution?

#2 Manners & Strangers

We teach our kids not to talk to strangers, and we teach them that it isn't polite to ask people for things, yet, one night a year, we let our kids knock on the doors of strangers and ask them for candy.

One gutsy moment for me as a child happened on my way home from school. I had just turned twelve, and my best friend Bridget and I were famished after a long day of sitting in classrooms.

At about 3:20 in the afternoon, as we were walking home with stomach pains from hunger, we had this bright idea.

We could trick-or-treat!

We knocked on the door of an apartment near our school, and an elderly woman opened the door. Very surprised to see us, she asked, "Isn't it a little early, girls?"

She gave us some candy anyway.

As a mother reflecting on the idea of trick or treating, it strikes me as being a contradiction of everything we’ve taught our children thus far.

We teach them that it's not polite to ask for things, yet once a year, it is permitted. We teach our kids not to speak to strangers and NEVER to take candy from a stranger, yet once a year, it is permissible.

Of course, there are always exceptions to the rules, but this one seems to go a little too far.

#3 Corporate Horror Show

Halloween has become a creepy holiday; the decorations have become gothic and violent since the corporate world has recognized it’s money-making potential.

When we were little, we had innocent little costumes: princesses and cowboy outfits. You could be a witch if you wanted, but the witch was harmless.

In my old neighborhood, a neighbor had gravestones on his front lawn and skeletons that moved and looked like they were coming out of graves. When we drove up the hill at night, my kids used to get scared because the scene looked so real.

So did I!

And that was a mild scene. My friend's neighbor in the town next to us would spend a fortune decorating his lawn until it looked like the scene out of a horror movie. I used to wonder what on earth that man was thinking.

Halloween is supposed to be for kids, not psychopaths.

#4 Waste & Starvation

I like the idea of carving pumpkins, but should we be wasting food like that? With so much starvation and deprivation in the world, it seems insensitive to waste pumpkins for a night of amusement.

For Halloween, about 22.2 million pumpkins go to waste! At your average price of $5.00 per pumpkin, that's 111,000,000 dollars of food that we waste.

The average cost to feed one person per day in the US is supposed to be about $11.00 (seems very low); divided by 111, 000,000, we could feed 10 million people, roughly. (2022 stats)

My god, that's shameful.

What Can Kids Do Instead of Trick or Treating?

  1. Have a costume party

  2. Start a local fund and ask people to donate $5.00—instead of buying a pumpkin—and then use the money to donate food to a local charity.

  3. Study the history of Halloween, the practice of Halloween, and the contradictions of Halloween, and ask your children to take a position for or against it and write an age-appropriate essay.

What You Should Not Do

  1. Don’t take a stance of moral superiority if you decide to skip Halloween.

I had a friend once whose children would stay home on Halloween. When the neighborhood kids knocked on their door, they would offer candy and then explain to them why they didn’t celebrate Halloween.

The unspoken was that the family was morally superior to those ill-fated enough to knock on their door, and no one accepted candy from that family without feeling a little less good about themselves.

Instead, teach your children that everyone is entitled to their beliefs and to their opinions, just as your children are entitled to their own.

While your children may not always agree with other people, they do need to respect other people’s ways because each person on earth is worthy of being treated with respect and dignity.

And lastly, if you decide to skip Halloween, don’t give candy to other people’s children. Put a “Do Not Disturb” sign on your door and leave it at that.

Don’t miss our free downloadTen Books Every Well-Educated Child Should Read.

Teach your child to read before sending him to school! Learn more about Elizabeth's unique course, How to Teach Your Child to Read and Raise a Child Who Loves to Read.

For parents of children under age seven who would like to prepare their child for social and academic success, please begin with Elizabeth’s singular online course, Raise Your Child to Thrive in Life and Excel in Learning.

When you join the Smart Homeschooler Academy online course for parents, Elizabeth will make homeschooling manageable for you. She’ll guide you in helping your kids reach their intellectual potential and developing good character.

As a homeschooler, you will feel confident, calm, and motivated knowing you have the tools and support you need to homeschool successfully.

Elizabeth Y. Hanson is a homeschooling thought-leader and the founder of Smart Homeschooler.

As an Educator, Homeschool Emerita, Writer, and Love and Leadership Certified Parenting Coach, Elizabeth has 21+ years of experience working in education.

Developing a comprehensive understanding of how to raise and educate a child, she devotes her time to helping parents get it right.

Elizabeth is available for one-on-one consultations as needed.

"I know Elizabeth Y. Hanson as a remarkably intelligent, highly sensitive woman with a moral nature and deep insight into differences between schooling and education. Elizabeth's mastery of current educational difficulties is a testimony to her comprehensive understanding of the competing worlds of schooling and education. She has a good heart and a good head. What more can I say?”

John Taylor Gatto Distinguished educator, public speaker, and best-selling author of Dumbing Us Down: The Hidden Curriculum of Compulsory Schooling

Should You Teach Your Children That "He" Is a Politically-Incorrect Pronoun?

No, because it is potentially dangerous not to teach the grammatically correct usage of “he.”

In Defense of Language

Defenders of language are opposed to the idea of gender-neutralizing language, as are many, many others.

So I was not a little taken aback when a friend told me that I should replace the pronoun "he" with "they" in my writing.

Her concern was that people would think I was literally writing about boys rather than understanding "he" is a centuries-old pronoun that stands in place of an antecedent noun that could be of either sex.

Dumb-founded by my friend’s reasoning, I asked a couple of my grammarian friends if they had encountered this same concern. Maybe their being British had some bearing on my findings, but each emphatically said, "No!"

If you read Mr. Gwynne's Grammar, a best seller in England, you will find a section on the use of the pronoun "he." Mr. Gwynne makes a point of differentiating between “sex” and “gender.”

The word to indicate whether someone is male or female is ‘sex,’ not ‘gender,’ which is purely a grammatical term.
— Mr. Gwynne

Basic Grammar

Assigning gender to a noun is woven into the structure of many languages, including the Romance languages. The gender of a noun will determine which form of an adjective or pronoun should accompany it.

For example, in Latin, “mensa” is a feminine noun that means "table.” To say " the beautiful table," we use the adjective’s feminine form of “beautiful” to agree with the feminine gender of “table,” hence, “mensa pulchra.”

French, Italian, Spanish, Portuguese and Romanian follow a similar structure.

As you can see, gender in language has nothing to do with an individual's biological sex regardless of claims to the contrary, although there is of course some overlap when human beings and animals of the female sex are being referred to.

As reason would have it, therefore, the correct use of the pronoun "he," to stand in place of a noun that could be of either sex, is not sexist but grammatically correct.

For example, let’s take this sentence as an example: “If we teach a child to read too early, he may struggle to read well later.”

“He” stands in the place of “child,” who could be either a boy or a girl.

I’ve studied authoritarianism for a very long time - for 40 years - and they’re started by people’s attempts to control the ideological and linguistic territory
— Jordan Peterson

Language Does Matter

Using language correctly does matter. If you’re unsure of how much our freedom of speech depends upon the correct use of language, read George Orwell’s book, 1984.

Our language is the means through which we understand ourselves and the world in which we live. When we start meddling with one of its basic units, we do so with potentially disastrous results, such as being confused about the biological difference between a man or a woman.

There's a sort of madness at play here.

My point is that if you are a homeschooling parent teaching your child English grammar, please teach him that "he" is a centuries-old pronoun and cannot be replaced with “they".

Instead, teach your child that “he” replaces the antecedent noun when the noun could be of either sex, and we cannot afford to lose him!

Don’t miss our free downloadTen Books Every Well-Educated Child Should Read.

Teach your child to read before sending him to school! Learn more about Elizabeth's unique course, How to Teach Your Child to Read and Raise a Child Who Loves to Read.

For parents of children under age seven who would like to prepare their child for social and academic success, please begin with Elizabeth’s singular online course, Raise Your Child to Thrive in Life and Excel in Learning.

When you join the Smart Homeschooler Academy online course for parents, Elizabeth will make homeschooling manageable for you. She’ll guide you in helping your kids reach their intellectual potential and developing good character.

As a homeschooler, you will feel confident, calm, and motivated knowing you have the tools and support you need to homeschool successfully.

Elizabeth Y. Hanson is a homeschooling thought-leader and the founder of Smart Homeschooler.

As an Educator, Homeschool Emerita, Writer, and Love and Leadership Certified Parenting Coach, Elizabeth has 21+ years of experience working in education.

Developing a comprehensive understanding of how to raise and educate a child, she devotes her time to helping parents get it right.

Elizabeth is available for one-on-one consultations as needed.

"I know Elizabeth Y. Hanson as a remarkably intelligent, highly sensitive woman with a moral nature and deep insight into differences between schooling and education. Elizabeth's mastery of current educational difficulties is a testimony to her comprehensive understanding of the competing worlds of schooling and education. She has a good heart and a good head. What more can I say?”

John Taylor Gatto Distinguished educator, public speaker, and best-selling author of Dumbing Us Down: The Hidden Curriculum of Compulsory Schooling

4 Tips to Raise Honest Children in an Increasingly Dishonest Society

A Dishonest Trend

Ninety-seven percent of schoolchildren cheat to pass exams, according to statistics gathered by Vickie Abeles, who produced the documentary, Race to Nowhere.

I’m not upset that you lied to me, I’m upset that from now on I can’t believe you.
— Friedrich Nietzsche

When my son was an undergrad, he took a statistics exam online—during the Covid days—only to receive an email from the teacher the following day, announcing that some of the students had cheated on the exam.

Juxtapose this to pre-1950s when students were on the honor system and cheating was relatively unheard of.

When the lines between honesty and dishonesty become so blurred that cheating on exams becomes common, we have a problem.

When a grown child finishes school, if he’s learned to cheat in school, he suddenly won’t become someone who never cheats; that’s not how it works.

These children have learned to engage in dishonest behavior, because they were raised in a system that doesn't uphold the values of honesty. Now, if you are younger, the level of dishonesty might not be as obvious to you, but as someone who grew up in relatively honest times, I find it glaring.

And as someone who has lived in countries where cheating is common, I can also tell you that people lose the ability to discern truth from lies. They will cheat you and justify it, because they have lost the ability to discern a “white” lie from a lie.

It’s a fine line but I would say that a white lie is something you might tell someone in order not to hurt their feelings, but a lie is something you might tell someone to deceive them for your benefit.

It’s not as easy to raise a children in the post-modern climate—but there are strategies you can implement to ensure they grow up knowing the difference between right and wrong.

  1. Role Models

Good role models in a child’s life are essential. If the parents treat each other courteously, if they are respectful to their family and friends, if they are honest and helpful with others, their children are more likely to follow suit.

Always do what is right. It will gratify half of mankind and astound the other.
— Mark Twain

As far as honesty goes, this means we don’t skip paying for an item if the checker overlooked it, or we try to get a discounted price to a national park by lying about one of our children’s ages, or we tell someone we won’t be home when we will be home.

These are untruths that our children will take notice of and do as we do. We can’t model dishonesty and then fault our children when they aren’t honest with us.

2. Discipline

There is also a training through discipline that has to occur, too, as no child is born perfect no matter how good his or her parents may be.

Good wombs have borne bad sons.
— The Tempest, Shakespeare

You have a higher chance of having your children grow up to be civil people if you understand how to train them in the ways of good character. 

3. Public School

Public school can undo your hard work, though, because rudeness and crudeness are now more common, and teachers have little to no authority when it comes to correcting a child's behavior. 

Children sent to school for eight hours a day, where the teachers are not allowed to discipline them, are at an obvious disadvantage for developing healthy character traits.

On the contrary, children who spend their days in a homeschooled environment have a much greater advantage than schoolchildren. Guiding children in the ways of correct behavior is something any discerning homeschool parent can easily do.

Spare the rod, spoil the child, was an old adage that adults used to repeat before the 1960's cultural revolution when the time-tested principles of raising children were abandoned.

4. Modern Inconveniences

Today, we can add to the problem the modern inconvenience of vulgar films, ribald music; silly, literature; violent video games, rude social media behavior, and stupid television programs.

The environment a child grows up in will help to shape his character, which means that we want to be diligent with the kind of multimedia we expose our children to.

In a Nutshell

A child who grows up with the ability to discern truth from falsehood, beauty from ugliness, and good from bad is a child who was guided well in his youth.

Don’t miss our free downloadTen Books Every Well-Educated Child Should Read.

Teach your child to read before sending him to school! Learn more about Elizabeth's unique course, How to Teach Your Child to Read and Raise a Child Who Loves to Read.

For parents of children under age seven who would like to prepare their child for social and academic success, please begin with Elizabeth’s singular online course, Raise Your Child to Thrive in Life and Excel in Learning.

When you join the Smart Homeschooler Academy online course for parents, Elizabeth will make homeschooling manageable for you. She’ll guide you in helping your kids reach their intellectual potential and developing good character.

As a homeschooler, you will feel confident, calm, and motivated knowing you have the tools and support you need to homeschool successfully.

Elizabeth Y. Hanson is a homeschooling thought-leader and the founder of Smart Homeschooler.

As an Educator, Homeschool Emerita, Writer, and Love and Leadership Certified Parenting Coach, Elizabeth has 21+ years of experience working in education.

Developing a comprehensive understanding of how to raise and educate a child, she devotes her time to helping parents get it right.

Elizabeth is available for one-on-one consultations as needed.

"I know Elizabeth Y. Hanson as a remarkably intelligent, highly sensitive woman with a moral nature and deep insight into differences between schooling and education. Elizabeth's mastery of current educational difficulties is a testimony to her comprehensive understanding of the competing worlds of schooling and education. She has a good heart and a good head. What more can I say?”

John Taylor Gatto Distinguished educator, public speaker, and best-selling author of Dumbing Us Down: The Hidden Curriculum of Compulsory Schooling

3 Things Your Child Must Do Even if It Makes You Panic

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Sometimes we parents can be very irrational.

We aren’t afraid to let our children do things that may be damaging to their development like play video games or watch TV; but then our fear gets in the way of letting them do things that are good for their development like taking risks and having adventures of their own making.

Children need to be in the natural world taking risks, getting dirty, and having fun. Without taking risks, they don’t learn the limitations of their bodies and may be more prone to accidents later, nor will they develop their courage muscles.

Courage is an essential quality because we don’t want our kids to be paralyzed from fear and unable to live life to its fullest.

With that in mind, here are three things that you must let your children do no matter how much it makes you panic:

1) Climb a Tree

Children have a natural sense of what they can do and what they can't do. Serious accidents are uncommon, but in the helicopter parenting world, parents are afraid (moms especially) to let their children do things because they "might" get hurt.

Let them get hurt! A few bumps and scrapes won't kill them. They even survive broken bones.

We grew up in Northern California amongst the redwood trees, the most towering trees in the world. We would climb trees until we got tired of climbing or too scared to climb any higher, which was usually about 30 feet off the ground (an educated guess looking back many years!).

Yes, it was scary, but it was also a thrill.

The woods were my Ritalin. Nature calmed me, focused me, and yet excited my senses.
— Richard Louv

We felt like conquerors; not of land, but of our fear. We felt a sense of accomplishment to have climbed so high, and it gave us a sense of confidence, excitement, and adventure.

Not everyone has such tall trees available to them, but I have since witnessed mothers who were afraid to let their four-year-old climb a thick tree branch that was two feet off the ground.

When we say things like, "Stop, that's too dangerous!" we interfere with our child’s developmental process and experience of living with joy.

Once I saw a child, with a pure look of excitement in her eyes, attempt to do something daring only to have her parent tell her to stop.

I literally watched the light of her excitement as it got snuffed.

If something is too dangerous–as in serious injury or death could result–you probably want to intervene, but beyond that let children do what children do best.

2) Make Mud Pies

Children love to play in the mud. They don't think in constructs of clean or dirty, but only of fun, exciting, and entertaining. And playing in the mud is nothing if it isn’t fun, exciting, and entertaining.

So, indulge them.

Time in nature is not leisure time; it’s an essential investment in our chidlren’s health (and also, by the way, in our own).
— Richard Louv

When my children were young, we had a backyard with a large section of dirt in it. They spent hours there covering themselves in mud to their heart's content. Mud was matted in their hair, dripping from their ears, and embedded in their clothes by the time they were finished.

They made mud pies and had make-believe meals, they examined the mud as they closed their fists around it and watched it squish through their fingers, and they had lots of mud fights.

Yes, I had a huge mess to clean up, but it was always more amusing to me than anything else.

Mud is a perfect medium for developing your children’s senses, imagination, and motor skills. it's a great natural resource that will keep them occupied for hours.

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Eat Mud

I know this might be over the top for many of you, but unless you live in an area where they spray pesticides or you live in a high traffic zone, then let your children eat mud. They won't eat much, but they do like to taste it.

I remember eating mud when I was young. It tasted like clay, but I don't think I did more than just taste it. The point is that there was no one hovering over me telling me to stop.

And if an adult had been nearby, they wouldn’t have been worried about it either. Tasting mud was a part of childhood - all children try it at some point. Who doesn't want to know what a little bit of mud tastes like?

Nature is often overlooked as a healing balm for the emotional hardships in a child’s life.
— Richard Louv

According to modern science, immersing themselves in mud boosters their immune systems. We even have an International Mud Day on June 29th now. This holiday must be in retaliation for the hyper-sterile environment that children in the post-modern world are raised in.

According to the "Hygiene Hypothesis," the sterile environment is putting children at risk for allergies, asthma, and autoimmune diseases as they get older.

Their reasoning is that the immune system develops by exposure to bacteria, viruses, and parasites, and in the modernly-sterile environment children's immune systems are not being exposed to them enough, and therefore, they’re immune systems aren't as strong as they should be.

It’s a theory, and not one I personally subscribe to, but it’s important to understand that exposure to germs strengthens our immunity. Ironically, as much as we try to prevent childhood diseases, many of these diseases are safer to contract as children than as an adult.

3) Rolling Down Hills

In my childhood, we used to climb to the top of a hill and then see who could roll down the fastest. What fun we had.

Do children still roll down hills today?!

I sympathize with any parent who does not want their child to ruin his clothes, especially if you are on a tight budget. And that’s why kids need clothes they can get dirty in.

While it's fine to have an outfit or two for when the occasion calls, the day-to-day dress of a child should not be designer clothes but rough and tumble clothes.

And one last thing, remember that a few bumps, and bruises never killed anyone. Children take pride in their bumps and bruises especially the ones that require some cleaning and bandaging.

They're a sign of the battles fought on the playground of life.

Don’t miss our free downloadTen Books Every Well-Educated Child Should Read.

Teach your child to read before sending him to school! Learn more about Elizabeth's unique course, How to Teach Your Child to Read and Raise a Child Who Loves to Read.

For parents of children under age seven who would like to prepare their child for social and academic success, please begin with Elizabeth’s singular online course, Raise Your Child to Thrive in Life and Excel in Learning.

When you join the Smart Homeschooler Academy online course for parents, Elizabeth will make homeschooling manageable for you. She’ll guide you in helping your kids reach their intellectual potential and developing good character.

As a homeschooler, you will feel confident, calm, and motivated knowing you have the tools and support you need to homeschool successfully.

Elizabeth Y. Hanson is a homeschooling thought-leader and the founder of Smart Homeschooler.

As an Educator, Homeschool Emerita, Writer, and Love and Leadership Certified Parenting Coach, Elizabeth has 21+ years of experience working in education.

Developing a comprehensive understanding of how to raise and educate a child, she devotes her time to helping parents get it right.

Elizabeth is available for one-on-one consultations as needed.

"I know Elizabeth Y. Hanson as a remarkably intelligent, highly sensitive woman with a moral nature and deep insight into differences between schooling and education. Elizabeth's mastery of current educational difficulties is a testimony to her comprehensive understanding of the competing worlds of schooling and education. She has a good heart and a good head. What more can I say?”

John Taylor Gatto Distinguished educator, public speaker, and best-selling author of Dumbing Us Down: The Hidden Curriculum of Compulsory Schooling

The Productive Mother's Homeschooling Routine

The Productive Mother's Homeschooling Routine

We know the hours can easily disappear when we don't have a schedule in place for our day, especially when homeschooling.

Every minute you spend in planning saves 10 minutes in execution; this gives you a 1,000 percent Return on Energy!
— Brian Tracy, author of Eat that Frog!

To reach your new homeschool year’s goals, you want to set your days up for success.

Otherwise, you’ll feel overwhelmed and exhausted scrambling to get everything done after you’ve run out of time. In other words, you won’t get it done.

It happened to me, and it’ll happen to you too if you don’t watch out!

One way to be more productive during the day is to create a morning routine.

HOW TO PLAN YOUR MORNING

Planning your morning is a matter of working backwards, starting with the night before. You have to decide what time you will go to sleep, so you get enough sleep to wake up at the optimal time to perform your morning routine.

As a mother of two, the morning hours were important to me as they are probably important to you. Waking up an hour or so before your children will give you a less harried start on the day.

To create your morning routine, you have to first decide what are the important things you want to do as a part of your routine.

Whatever you decide, write your schedule down on paper so you can see it in front of you. Pin it to the wall or wherever you want to put it to remind yourself of each step. You want to follow a certain order too, so your routine becomes a habit you don’t have to think about.

After coffee, you read for 30 minutes; after reading, you go for a 30-minute walk and so forth.

The things you write down will be your morning ritual. It’s sounds so simple, but it will have a huge impact on how much you get done. Planning a routine is also a proactive strategy which will serve to keep your stress levels down as well.

But it doesn’t stop there, not when you have kids!

THE OFFSPRING RITUAL

You want to follow your morning ritual with what I call the Offspring ritual.

Teach your children to get into the habit of getting up at a certain hour each day and performing their morning ritual. Maybe they start their day by brushing their teeth and then chatting with you for 10 or 15 minutes to reconnect after a good night’s sleep.

After a good chat, they run off to get dressed, put their dirty clothes in the hamper, make their beds, and come in for breakfast at a designated time.

(Eating on a schedule is much better for your children’s health than eating at random meal times.)

Depending on how you set things up, you can prepare breakfast while they are getting ready or you can enjoy another cup of coffee and wait for them to help you prepare it.

After a relaxed breakfast, the children clean up while you get ready to teach And that’s why we also need a homeschool ritual.

After you finish eating breakfast with your children, you will head to your homeschool room and examine your plan for the day and prepare to teach your children.

Once your mind is in gear for teaching, you can ring your school bell!

THE HOMESCHOOLING RITUAL

A general rule is to teach your most essential subjects first, the ones that if there were an interruption to your day, you could still relax knowing you'd gotten those finished.

Language arts and math for the morning hours work well.

Give your children 2-minute breaks when they begin to get restless, so they can stretch, run around the block, or jump on a trampoline. Getting a good dose of oxygen into their brains will replenish their thinking energy.

You want to schedule a long lunchtime break when they can eat and then go outside and play for a while.

Let the morning hours be the more intense hours of study, and in the afternoon you can take it easy. Read some history, do a science experiment, or read a story out loud. Some days you may have outings planned with other homeschoolers.

Always make sure you children have enough some time to read or pursue their hobbies; practice an instrument, do some artwork, or play a sport.

On the days when you stay home, try to finish homeschooling around the same time each day, so everyone has leisure time before dinner including, and most importantly, yourself!

Final Reminders

If you create a schedule and adhere to it, you will prevent your day from slipping right past you. Otherwise you’ll find that too many times the afternoon has rolled around, and you have barely made it past grammar.

Excellence / Perfection is not a destination; it is a continuous journey that never ends.
— Brian Tracy

The key to your success with keeping a routine is to keep in mind that we are not perfect beings and some days we will falter in our plan. We don’t tell ourselves we are hopeless at sticking to a plan, as this will reinforce that behavior.

Instead we get up the next day with a new intention, and we start all over again. Eventually, we will get better and discover the freedom and ease that comes with keeping to a plan not to mention more productive homeschooling days!

Don’t miss our free downloadTen Books Every Well-Educated Child Should Read.

Teach your child to read before sending him to school! Learn more about Elizabeth's unique course, How to Teach Your Child to Read and Raise a Child Who Loves to Read.

For parents of children under age seven who would like to prepare their child for social and academic success, please begin with Elizabeth’s singular online course, Raise Your Child to Thrive in Life and Excel in Learning.

When you join the Smart Homeschooler Academy online course for parents, Elizabeth will make homeschooling manageable for you. She’ll guide you in helping your kids reach their intellectual potential and developing good character.

As a homeschooler, you will feel confident, calm, and motivated knowing you have the tools and support you need to homeschool successfully.

Elizabeth Y. Hanson is a homeschooling thought-leader and the founder of Smart Homeschooler.

As an Educator, Homeschool Emerita, Writer, and Love and Leadership Certified Parenting Coach, Elizabeth has 21+ years of experience working in education.

Developing a comprehensive understanding of how to raise and educate a child, she devotes her time to helping parents get it right.

Elizabeth is available for one-on-one consultations as needed.

"I know Elizabeth Y. Hanson as a remarkably intelligent, highly sensitive woman with a moral nature and deep insight into differences between schooling and education. Elizabeth's mastery of current educational difficulties is a testimony to her comprehensive understanding of the competing worlds of schooling and education. She has a good heart and a good head. What more can I say?”

John Taylor Gatto Distinguished educator, public speaker, and best-selling author of Dumbing Us Down: The Hidden Curriculum of Compulsory Schooling

What Key Trait Do Independent Thinkers Possess?

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It's easy to adorn oneself according to the latest fad, but it’s not so easy to stand in one’s truth when it goes against mob rule.

Learning to think and act independently requires courage: the courage to do what's right and just even in the face of ridicule, the loss of friends, or a loss of income.

John Taylor Gatto was an excellent example. He quit teaching when he was in his 60s, because he discovered that schools were causing more harm to children than good.

As a public schoolteacher, he believed that he was a part of the problem.

John sent an op-ed to the Wall Street Journal and announced his decision to quit teaching in schools. When you are a couple of years away from retirement and a pension plan, it takes a lot of courage to walk away.

Character is higher than intellect.
— Ralph Waldo Emerson

Sporting purple hair and nose rings is not a sign of an independent character. People who dye their hair crazy colors and fill their bodies with tattoos and rings are following a group-think fad in spite of their belief to the contrary.

We should teach our children to dress well and to conform to outward standards of propriety but to be nonconforming in their attitudes, beliefs and values.

Because the greater independence of the mind is not manifest outwardly; it's an inward state.

To raise our children to be independent in mind, we need to foster courage in their characters.

People often mistake courage for the absence of fear, but the absence of fear can lead to rashness. Courage is not an absence of fear, but the ability to act in spite of one’s fear.

For example, my children performed at piano recitals, recited poetry to small audiences, and attended public speaking classes. Through these kind of activities, they learned to develop their courage muscle.

Permitting your child to run into a local grocery store alone, to climb a tree, or to ride a bike for the first time are all activities that will strengthen his courage.

Every day there will be opportunities to let our children strengthen their courage.

As we know from Aristotle, and as we can observe in our own lives,  our daily habits add up to the quality of our characters.

Children like to challenge themselves, and we need to encourage them to do so. The more they learn to face challenges in spite of the difficulty or discomfort, the more courage they develop.

It is curious that physical courage should be so common in the world and moral courage so rare.
— Mark Twain

Having courage will also help to preserve their moral integrity, because having moral integrity requires us to stand in our truth both privately and in public.

Someone once told me that I needed to develop a “public” persona. In other words, I should have two selves; one for the public and one for my private life.

But I believe the goal is to have one self.

As Shakespeare said in Hamlet:

This above all: To thine own self be true, and it must follow, as the night the day, thou canst not then be false to any man.

Don’t miss our free downloadTen Books Every Well-Educated Child Should Read.

Teach your child to read before sending him to school! Learn more about Elizabeth's unique course, How to Teach Your Child to Read and Raise a Child Who Loves to Read.

For parents of children under age seven who would like to prepare their child for social and academic success, please begin with Elizabeth’s singular online course, Raise Your Child to Thrive in Life and Excel in Learning.

When you join the Smart Homeschooler Academy online course for parents, Elizabeth will make homeschooling manageable for you. She’ll guide you in helping your kids reach their intellectual potential and developing good character.

As a homeschooler, you will feel confident, calm, and motivated knowing you have the tools and support you need to homeschool successfully.

Elizabeth Y. Hanson is a homeschooling thought-leader and the founder of Smart Homeschooler.

As an Educator, Homeschool Emerita, Writer, and Love and Leadership Certified Parenting Coach, Elizabeth has 21+ years of experience working in education.

Developing a comprehensive understanding of how to raise and educate a child, she devotes her time to helping parents get it right.

Elizabeth is available for one-on-one consultations as needed.

"I know Elizabeth Y. Hanson as a remarkably intelligent, highly sensitive woman with a moral nature and deep insight into differences between schooling and education. Elizabeth's mastery of current educational difficulties is a testimony to her comprehensive understanding of the competing worlds of schooling and education. She has a good heart and a good head. What more can I say?”

John Taylor Gatto Distinguished educator, public speaker, and best-selling author of Dumbing Us Down: The Hidden Curriculum of Compulsory Schooling

The Secret to Raising Grateful Children

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"No matter what I do, it never seems to be enough!" is a typical complaint from your average 21st-century parent.

While parents are understandably frustrated, they're little ones are growing up to become entitled adults.

Common strategies employed to battle the empidemic of ingratitude are not working either. The Sermon is a perfect example of a strategy that has failed us.

THE SERMON

We lecture our kids to be grateful for what they have, and our lectures fall on deaf ears. They have no idea what we are talking about. For the most part, they always had what they need and gotten what they wanted.

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And even if they hadn’t, poor character traits are not conquered by lecturing and “ingratitude” is a poor character trait.

Better not to let the trait develop in the first place!

“Take full account of what Excellencies you possess, and in gratitude remember how you would hanker after them, if you had them not.”

— Marcus Aurelius

THE SECRET

The secret, therefore, to teaching your children to appreciate the things you provide for them is to raise them to be minimalists. The less they have, the more appreciative they'll be when you give them more.

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The less often you indulge them with their wants, the less they'll come to expect them. When you do give your children a want, they'll be grateful, and they won't forget to say thank you.

The words of true gratitude will come roaring out of them, no prodding needed.

A minimalist philosophy isn't restricted to material goods either. You can apply it to all aspects of your children’s lives by saying “no” to them more than you say “yes.”

John Rosemond calls it Vitamin N. It's not that you want to become a contrarian and rigidly oppose everything your children ask for, but raise them to understand that their wants are not your primary concern.

“Piglet noticed that even though he had a Very Small Heart, it could hold a rather large amount of Gratitude.”

— A. A. Milne, Winnie the Pooh

Provide your children with the things they need for emotional, physical, spiritual, and intellectual growth, but raise them to understand that the goal of your life is not to make them happy but to raise them well.

This isn't to say that you never accommodate a want of theirs, but don't make it a habit to indulge them too much.

What’s the rule?!

It’s simple: say no 75% of the time and say yes 25% of the time. If you practice this ratio of yes to no’s, you’ll see the gratitude scale climb steadily in your home.

A golden parenting rule to remember is that you aren't responsible for making your children happy; that’s up to them to figure out.

And they’ll discover the secret to happiness much faster if you indulge them less.

Don’t miss our free downloadTen Books Every Well-Educated Child Should Read.

Teach your child to read before sending him to school! Learn more about Elizabeth's unique course, How to Teach Your Child to Read and Raise a Child Who Loves to Read.

For parents of children under age seven who would like to prepare their child for social and academic success, please begin with Elizabeth’s singular online course, Raise Your Child to Thrive in Life and Excel in Learning.

When you join the Smart Homeschooler Academy online course for parents, Elizabeth will make homeschooling manageable for you. She’ll guide you in helping your kids reach their intellectual potential and developing good character.

As a homeschooler, you will feel confident, calm, and motivated knowing you have the tools and support you need to homeschool successfully.

Elizabeth Y. Hanson is a homeschooling thought-leader and the founder of Smart Homeschooler.

As an Educator, Homeschool Emerita, Writer, and Love and Leadership Certified Parenting Coach, Elizabeth has 21+ years of experience working in education.

Developing a comprehensive understanding of how to raise and educate a child, she devotes her time to helping parents get it right.

Elizabeth is available for one-on-one consultations as needed.

"I know Elizabeth Y. Hanson as a remarkably intelligent, highly sensitive woman with a moral nature and deep insight into differences between schooling and education. Elizabeth's mastery of current educational difficulties is a testimony to her comprehensive understanding of the competing worlds of schooling and education. She has a good heart and a good head. What more can I say?”

John Taylor Gatto Distinguished educator, public speaker, and best-selling author of Dumbing Us Down: The Hidden Curriculum of Compulsory Schooling

5 Reasons Why Leisure Time Matters More than Extra-Curricular Activities

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We over schedule our children and fail to recognize the inherent harm in making extra-curricular activities a priority in our family's life.

Let's look at the consequences of hyper-scheduling our kids.

  1. Stress levels increase for everyone

  2. No one has time to discover the simple pleasures of life

  3. Family time is compromised

  4. Too Many Missed Family Meals 

  5. Exhaustion

Yet, our minds and our bodies crave and need downtime to relax and experience life at a slower pace. Our children's needs aren't any different.

Why Leisure Time Matters More

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Hobbies

Children need leisure time to learn how to entertain themselves with hobbies like needlepoint, knitting, collecting stamps, or building model airplanes. Maybe they want to explore the outdoors or build something from scratch. Hobbies give us something to look forward to no matter how young or how old we are. During rough patches in life, our hobbies will keep us moving forward.

Social Skills

Leisure time also allows children to go outdoors and play with the neighborhood kids or visit a friend, both of which are crucial to developing good social skills. 

Time is a game played beautifully by children.
— Heraclitus

Read a Book

And sometimes, like us, a child just wants to lie down and read a book. There are a lot of reasons why children don't read today, but one of them may be that they don’t have enough leisure time to develop the habit of reading.

Family Time

When each child has multiple extra-curricular activities, there's little time for shared activities as a family. 

Your family time begins to revolve around extra-curricular activities; in other words, family life becomes less o a priority than extra-curricular activities.

Exhaustion

Some children need more downtime than others. The over-scheduling of their day can result in fatigue and a loss of enthusiasm. The underlying stress of having too much to do can make them irritable and unpleasant to be around.

We all know what it feels like to be exhausted!

Too Many Missed Family Meals

Often the extra-curricular activities take place in the evenings leaving no one home to cook or serve a family meal. Consequently, the family eats with dad while you rush Tommy to soccer practice. 

We know the importance of family meals for children. The more family meals you share, the fewer problems your kids will have. Children need to feel emotionally connected to their family, and meal times is one of the critical ways in which they can connect.

According to research, having family meals at least 4 times a week lowers the risk of obesity, substance abuse, eating disorders, and an increased chance of graduating from high school.

Putting It into Perspective

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What's more important at the end of the day?

When your children are grown will it be more important that your kids were in a lot of activities or that your family has a strong bond which keeps you together whether your kids live near you or not.

Instead of over-scheduling your children, in addition to their homeschooling subjects, which would include sports, let them take one class in something they enjoy doing. But don’t let their classes interfere with meal times or weekend activities.

And make sure your children have enough leisure time to figure out where their interests lie and what they're good at. 

If you are losing your leisure, look out! — It may be you are losing your soul.
— Virginia Woolf

Don’t miss our free downloadTen Books Every Well-Educated Child Should Read.

Teach your child to read before sending him to school! Learn more about Elizabeth's unique course, How to Teach Your Child to Read and Raise a Child Who Loves to Read.

For parents of children under age seven who would like to prepare their child for social and academic success, please begin with Elizabeth’s singular online course, Raise Your Child to Thrive in Life and Excel in Learning.

When you join the Smart Homeschooler Smart Homeschooler Academy online course for parents, Elizabeth will make homeschooling manageable for you. She’ll guide you in helping your kids reach their intellectual potential and developing good character.

As a homeschooler, you will feel confident, calm, and motivated knowing you have the tools and support you need to homeschool successfully.

Elizabeth Y. Hanson is a homeschooling thought-leader and the founder of Smart Homeschooler.

As an Educator, Homeschool Emerita, Writer, and Love and Leadership Certified Parenting Coach, Elizabeth has 21+ years of experience working in education.

She has developed a comprehensive understanding of how to raise and educate a child, and she devotes her time to helping parents to get it right.

Elizabeth is available for one-on-one consultations as needed.