4 Strategies to Raise Children of Good Character

Societal influences can make it easy or difficult to raise a child who is well-mannered, respectful, and resourceful.

In today’s social climate, we face many parenting challenges, but there are strategies you can implement to ensure a better outcome for your family.

When our children are young, we want to train them to do the right thing, so they develop the right habits in childhood and learn to make the right choices.

Always do what is right. It will gratify half of mankind and astound the other.
— Mark Twain

It begins with little things such as learning to pick up after themselves, doing chores before they play, and learning to be considerate of other people's needs.

Role Models

Good role models in a child’s life are essential. If the parents treat each other courteously, are respectful towards family and friends, and honest and helpful with others, the children are more likely to follow suit.

Discipline

As no child is born a civilized human being, there is also a training through discipline that has to occur, too. In fact, raising our children to become civilized human beings is the essence of our work.

Good parents can produce bad children; there are no guarantees that children turn out well.

Discipline is key to developing the qualities that make up good character, as it takes discipline to do what is demanded of us!

Think of how much discipline it takes to pass up a piece of chocolate cake, to put away the screens, to go the gym.

Discipline is a key trait that most of us never develop. It is what sets the above-average, who reach great heights in their endeavors, from those who never will.

Public School

Public school can undo your hard work, though, because rudeness and crudeness are now the norms. Children sent to school for eight hours a day where the teachers are not allowed to discipline them, are at a disadvantage.

However children who spend their days in a homeschooled environment are with adults who are able to put the time and effort into guiding the kids in the right ways.

At home, we do have authority over our children and can discipline them as needed. The right training in childhood is essential to raising a well-mannered, happy child.

Spare the rod, spoil the child, was an old adage that adults used to repeat before the 60's cultural revolution when sound parenting principles were abandoned for unproven theories.

Multi Media

Another disadvantage to raising children today is the decline in quality films and the introduction of screen activities.

The films are vulgar, the music is ribald, childhood games are on screens, and texting replaces real conversation.

On top of that, social media alone is causing a distortion of the way children see themselves and the world, leading to a host of mental health issues.

Negative influences will unravel any good work you've done to raise your children well, which is why we need to be diligent with the environments that influence our children.

The aforementioned should be a strict NO for every concerned!

The Ancient Greeks knew that bad influences in a child's life would affect their characters. It is really just a matter of common sense, something the Ancient Greeks had plenty of.

We’ve buried our head’s in the sand, though, because we believe we can put our children into these environments and all will be fine.

Our children are telling us a different story, and it’s time we start listening to them.

We have a generation of children, raised on technology, who are becoming active in the movement to protect children from the ill-effects of technology, because they can see the damage it has caused to their generation.

A Dishonest Trend

Dishonesty is a serious character defect, but it is common now. Ninety-seven percent of schoolchildren are dishonest according to statistics gathered by Vickie Abeles, who produced the documentary, Race to Nowhere.

Even without the statistics, we know from experience that we are no longer an honest society. Each of us deals with it every single day.

During the Covid days, my son took a statistics exam online, only to receive an email from the teacher announcing that some of the students had cheated on the exam.

I was told the exam was easy, too. College students cheating on an easy exam?

I’m not upset that you lied to me, I’m upset that from now on I can’t believe you.
— Friedrich Nietzsche

Cheating is a habit for many children today.

When cheating on exams is pardoned with no serious repercussions, we are tolerating dishonesty and teaching our kids that it is no big deal.

But it is a big deal. Bad character is a big deal because these people cause harm to others, and they cause harm to themselves.

For sure, they don’t sleep well at night.

These students have learned to become dishonest people, because they are raised in a system that doesn't uphold the values of truth, goodness, and beauty.

It’s difficult to believe now that such values were once so honored in the West, but it is true.

In a Nutshell

Protect your children from the negative influences in society for as long as you can. Raise them in a bubble! Allow them the time to develop in healthy ways; physically, morally, and intellectually, because the bubble will burst.

When it does, you want to feel confident that you did your job well, by giving your children the right kind of start in life.

The rest is up to them.

Teach your child to read before sending him to school! Learn more about Elizabeth's unique course, How to Teach Your Child to Read and Raise a Child Who Loves to Read.

When you join the Smart Homeschooler Academy online course for parents, Liz will share her 6-step framework, so you can raise children of higher intelligence, critical thinking, and of good character.

As a homeschooler, you will never have to worry about failing your children, because working with Liz, you will feel confident, calm, and motivated; as she guides you to train your children’s minds and nurture their characters.

For parents of children under age seven who would like to prepare their child for social and academic success, please begin with Elizabeth’s singular online course, Raise Your Child to Thrive in Life and Excel in Learning.

Elizabeth Y. Hanson is a homeschooling thought-leader and the founder of Smart Homeschooler.

As an Educator, Homeschool Emerita, Writer, and Love and Leadership Certified Parenting Coach, she has 21+ years of experience working in education.

Developing a comprehensive understanding of how to raise and educate a child, based on tradition and modern research, and she devotes her time to helping parents to get it right.

Elizabeth is available for one-on-one consultations as needed.

"I know Elizabeth Y. Hanson as a remarkably intelligent, highly sensitive woman with a moral nature and deep insight into differences between schooling and education. Elizabeth's mastery of current educational difficulties is a testimony to her comprehensive understanding of the competing worlds of schooling and education. She has a good heart and a good head. What more can I say?”

John Taylor Gatto Distinguished educator, public speaker, and best-selling author of Dumbing Us Down: The Hidden Curriculum of Compulsory Schooling

11 Ways to Convince your Spouse to Homeschool (even if you think he'll never agree!)

If your husband or wife’s mind is already set against homeschooling, you have to approach the situation very gingerly. It’s not wise to push our views on someone, least of all a spouse.  

It is time that we squarely face the fact that institutional schoolteaching is destructive to children.
— John Taylor Gatto

Usually when a spouse doesn’t agree with homeschooling, it’s because he doesn’t understand what John Taylor Gatto refers to as "the dangers of public school."

The Conversation

But you can start the conversation by asking your spouse a question, such as, "What are your hopes and goals for our children’s education?"

You have now opened the channels for him to let you know his hopes and goals in a non-threatening way. As he shares these with you, listen for his concerns too.

Once you’ve got a friendly discussion going, approach the subject of homeschooling.

If you were to consider homeschooling, would he have any objections or concerns? If so, what would those be?

The Objections

The typical objections to homeschooling are the following:

  • The children will be academically behind and fail to get into a reputable college.

  • Homeschooled kids lack good social skills.

  • Homeschooled children don’t have any friends.

  • You aren’t qualified to homeschool unless you’re an accredited teacher.

  • You aren’t qualified to homeschool unless you have a college degree.

Maybe your husband doesn't know any homeschoolers and the idea sounds too fantastic to him?

Keep in mind that your spouse wants what is best for his children just as much as you do.

The Persuasion

Whatever his objections are, you want to take note and ask him if he would be open to watching some videos on the subject, looking at some research, or even reading some books together.

If you keep the conversation neutral and show a genuine interest in his views and concerns, most reasonable husbands will oblige their wives. 

Now, here comes the tricky part: you will need to provide him with information that is sound and relevant.

No need to panic though because we have you covered. You can download our free resource list to convince anyone about the merits of homeschooling.

The list will provide you with 11 resources to educate your husband (or anyone) about the many problems with public school and why homeschooling is the best option today. 

This resource is also helpful if you have family members or friends who are strongly opposed to homeschooling.

Grab your free download here: 11 Resources to Convince Anyone to Homeschool.

Once someone truly understands what is fundamentally wrong with public school, it is near impossible to put a child into it unless the person has no other choice.

Some Cautionary Advice

Be careful about taking the attitude of proving your spouse wrong. No one likes to be proven wrong, and trying to show your spouse that you were right will not help your cause. 

Instead, you want to humble yourself and be gentle in the way you handle the situation.

Go slowly.

When someone has a fixed opinion, it’s prudent to allow time for that person to shift into a new mindset.

Start early by educating your spouse when your children are young.

By the time they are ready to go to school, hopefully, you'll both be excited about homeschooling! 

School is a twelve-year jail sentence where bad habits are the only curriculum truly learned. I teach school and win awards doing it. I should know.
— John Taylor Gatto

Upcoming FREE Live Masterclass! Discover 3 Homeschooling Mistakes No One Tells You About! with Liz Hanson

When you join the Smart Homeschooler Academy online course for parents, Liz will share her 6-step framework, so you can raise children of higher intelligence, critical thinking, and of good character.

As a homeschooler, you will never have to worry about failing your children, because working with Liz, you will feel confident, calm, and motivated; as she guides you to train your children’s minds and nurture their characters.

Teach your child to read before sending him to school! Learn more about Elizabeth's unique course, How to Teach Your Child to Read and Raise a Child Who Loves to Read.

For parents of children under age seven who would like to prepare their child for social and academic success, please begin with Elizabeth’s singular online course, Raise Your Child to Thrive in Life and Excel in Learning.

Elizabeth Y. Hanson is a homeschooling thought-leader and the founder of Smart Homeschooler.

As an Educator, Homeschool Emerita, Writer, and Love and Leadership Certified Parenting Coach, she has 21+ years of experience working in education.

Developing a comprehensive understanding of how to raise and educate a child, based on tradition and modern research, and she devotes her time to helping parents to get it right.

Elizabeth is available for one-on-one consultations as needed.

"I know Elizabeth Y. Hanson as a remarkably intelligent, highly sensitive woman with a moral nature and deep insight into differences between schooling and education. Elizabeth's mastery of current educational difficulties is a testimony to her comprehensive understanding of the competing worlds of schooling and education. She has a good heart and a good head. What more can I say?”

John Taylor Gatto Distinguished educator, public speaker, and best-selling author of Dumbing Us Down: The Hidden Curriculum of Compulsory Schooling

The Six Purposes of Schooling by John Taylor Gatto

School bus.png

When people ask me why I homeschooled, I tell them I had no choice. If they knew what I knew about public education, they would homeschool too.

John Taylor Gatto was the man who opened my eyes to the nefarious agenda behind institutionalized schooling. What follows is a transcription of the key section from John’s classic speech and opus, The Underground History of American Education.

John was a brilliant and well-researched man. I have read what is below in Ingles’ book myself; it is all true.   

Transcription of John’s Talk

“I have something here.  I have the six purposes of schooling [from the book Principles of Secondary Education by Alexander James Inglis] as laid down in 1917 by the man whom Harvard named their Honor Lecture in Education for. 

So far from being a fringe individual, this guy is the reason the Harvard Honor Lecture in Education is named as it is:  The Inglis Lecture.  I would like to read you the six purposes of schooling.  I moved heaven and earth as it took years to find this book [Principles of Secondary Education]--just like trying to find in past years a copy of the Carol Quigley [book] Tragedy and Hope.  

I learned about Inglis from a twenty year President of Harvard [1933-1953], James Bryant Conant, who was a poison gas specialist in World War I--and was in the very inner circle of the Atomic Bomb Project in World War II--was High Commissioner of Occupied Germany after the War. 

So he [James Bryant Conant] wrote--there must be 20 books about the institution of schooling--of which he was completely a proponent.  And he is a very, very bad writer.  I forced myself to read most of these books, and one of them he says that if you really want to know what school is about, you need to pick up the book that I’m referring to Principles of Secondary Education

Two years it took me to find a copy of the book [Principles of Secondary Education by Alexander James Inglis]--750 pages, tiny print and as dull as your imagination can be.  And furthermore, it is not till you get to the very middle of the book--in an unlabelled section--that he spills the beans.  Let me spill them for you.  

 There are six purposes, or functions, as he calls them.  The first he [Alexander Inglis] calls the Adjustive Function: Schools are to establish fixed habits of reaction to authority.  That’s their main purpose--habits and reactions to authority. 

That is why school authorities don’t tear their hair out when somebody exposes that the Atomic Bomb wasn’t dropped on Korea, as a history book in the 1990s printed by Scott Foresman [did], and why each of these books has hundreds of substantive errors.  Learning isn’t the reason the texts are distributed.  

The Adjustive Function

So, first is the Adjustive Function--fixed habits.  Now here comes the wonderful insight that being able to analyze the detail will give you.  How can you establish whether someone has successfully developed this Automatic Reaction because people have a proclivity when they are given sensible orders to follow. 

That is not what they want to teach.  The only way you can measure this is to give stupid orders and people automatically follow those.  Now you have achieved Function #1.  

The Integrating Function

Have you ever ever wondered why some of the foolish things that schools do or allow to continue?  [Function] #2, he [Inglis] calls it the Integrating Function, but it is easier to understand if you call it the Conformity Function. 

It’s to make children alike as possible--the gifted children and the stupid--alike as possible because market research uses statistical sampling, and it only works if people react generally the same way.  

The Directive Function

The Third Function he calls the Directive Function: School is to diagnose your proper social role and then log the evidence that here is where you are on the Great Pyramid, so that future people won’t allow you to escape that compartment.  

The Differentiating Function

 The Fourth Function is the Differentiating Function.  Because once you have diagnosed the kids in this layer, you do not want them to learn anything that the higher layers are learning.  So you teach just as far as the requirement of that layer.  

The Selective Function

 Number five and six are the creepiest of all!  Number 5 is the Selective Function.  What that means is what Darwin meant by natural selection: You are assessing the breeding quality of each individual kid.  You’re doing it structurally because school teachers don’t know this is happening. 

And you’re trying to use ways to prevent the poor stuff from breeding.  And those ways are hanging labels--humiliating labels--around their neck, encouraging the shallowness of thinking.

 I often wondered, because I came from a very very strict Scotish-Irish culture that never allowed you to leer at a girl.  But when I got to NYC, the boys were pawing the girls openly and there was no redress for the girls at all, except not showing up in the classroom--high absentee rates. 

Well, you are supposed to teach structurally that sexual pleasure is what you withdraw from a relationship and everything else is a waste of time and expensive.  

 So, the Selective Function is what Darwin meant by the favored races.  The idea is to consciously improve the breeding stock.  Schools are meant to tag the unfit with their inferiority by poor grades, remedial placement, and humiliation, so that their peers will accept them as inferior.  And the good breeding stock among the females will reject them as possible partners.  

The Propaedeutic Function

 And the Sixth is the creepiest of all! And I think it is partly what Tragedy and Hope is about--a fancy Roman name, the Propaedeutic Function.  Because as early as Roman bigtime thinkers, it was understood that to continue a social form required that some people be trained that they were the custodians of this.  So, some small fraction of the kids are being ready to take over the project. 

That’s the guy--the honor lecturer [Inglis], and it will not surprise you that his ancestors include the major-general of the siege of the Luknow of India--famous for tying the mutineers’ on the muzzle of the cannons and blowing them apart, or somebody who was forced to flee NYC, a churchman at the beginning of the American Revolution, because he wrote a refutation of Thomas Paine’s Common Sense. 

They were going to tar and feather him.  He fled and was rewarded by the British by making him the Bishop of Nova Scotia.  Those are Inglis’ ancestors!  

 So, Al Inglis is certainly--when I learned of this and wrote to Harvard, asking for access to the Inglis Lecture.  Strike me dead, Lord, if I’m exaggerating at all.  I was told “We have no Inglis Lecture--hasn’t been for years, and we have no records. 

It was the same that happened when I discovered that Elwood B. Cubberly, the most influential schoolman of the 20th century and the bionomics genius had been the elementary school editor of Houghton Mifflin, and I wrote Houghton Mifflin--Is there any record? And they said, “We have no record of anyone named Elwood P. Cubberly. 

harvard.png

Now Harvard is telling me, “There is no Inglis Lecture.  A week passed and I got a call from Harvard, from some obscure office at Harvard, saying “What is your interest in the Ingles Lecture?”  I knew that I was on thin ice. 

And I said, “Well, James Conant referred me in his books to the man the Inglis Lecture is named after, and I was just wondering if I could get some background on this fellow, and a list of the lectures.  

 And in due time, I got a list of the lectures and instructions [on] how to access the texts, but not easily. Enough hoops that someone who has to mow the lawn and burp the baby wouldn’t jump through those hoops.  I was able to prove Harper’s [magazine] wouldn’t publish [it in] the cover essay I wrote, which Lew Laflin [?] named Against School, but I had called The Artificial Extension of Childhood because I think that is the key mechanism at work here.  

 So, they wouldn’t print the information about Cubberley because Houghton Mifflin denied it.  It was only months after that I looked through my extensive library of incredibly dull books about schooling, and I opened [one]--and on the facing page said Elwood B. Cubberly, Editor and Chief of Elementary School, publishing arm of Houghton Mifflin. 

By the way, the secondary Editor and Chief was Alexander Ingles.  So you see how this cousinage works.” 

*****

*Video transcribed by Roger Copple. To watch the full 12-minute video: The Six Purposes of Schooling [Video]

Don’t miss our free download, Ten Books Every Well-Educated Child Should Read.

When you join the Smart Homeschooler Academy online course for parents, Liz will share her 6-step framework, so you can raise children of higher intelligence, critical thinking, and of good character.

As a homeschooler, you will never have to worry about failing your children, because working with Liz, you will feel confident, calm, and motivated; as she guides you to train your children’s minds and nurture their characters.

Teach your child to read before sending him to school! Learn more about Elizabeth's unique course, How to Teach Your Child to Read and Raise a Child Who Loves to Read.

For parents of children under age seven who would like to prepare their child for social and academic success, please begin with Elizabeth’s singular online course, Raise Your Child to Thrive in Life and Excel in Learning.

Elizabeth Y. Hanson is a homeschooling thought-leader and the founder of Smart Homeschooler.

As an Educator, Homeschool Emerita, Writer, and Love and Leadership Certified Parenting Coach, she has 21+ years of experience working in education.

Developing a comprehensive understanding of how to raise and educate a child, based on tradition and modern research, and she devotes her time to helping parents to get it right.

Elizabeth is available for one-on-one consultations as needed.

"I know Elizabeth Y. Hanson as a remarkably intelligent, highly sensitive woman with a moral nature and deep insight into differences between schooling and education. Elizabeth's mastery of current educational difficulties is a testimony to her comprehensive understanding of the competing worlds of schooling and education. She has a good heart and a good head. What more can I say?”

John Taylor Gatto Distinguished educator, public speaker, and best-selling author of Dumbing Us Down: The Hidden Curriculum of Compulsory Schooling

4 Tips to Raise Honest Children in an Increasingly Dishonest Society

A Dishonest Trend

Ninety-seven percent of schoolchildren cheat to pass exams, according to statistics gathered by Vickie Abeles, who produced the documentary, Race to Nowhere.

I’m not upset that you lied to me, I’m upset that from now on I can’t believe you.
— Friedrich Nietzsche

When my son was an undergrad, he took a statistics exam online—during the Covid days—only to receive an email from the teacher the following day, announcing that some of the students had cheated on the exam.

Juxtapose this to pre-1950s when students were on the honor system and cheating was relatively unheard of.

When the lines between honesty and dishonesty become so blurred that cheating on exams becomes common, we have a problem.

When a grown child finishes school, if he’s learned to cheat in school, he suddenly won’t become someone who never cheats; that’s not how it works.

These children have learned to engage in dishonest behavior, because they were raised in a system that doesn't uphold the values of honesty. Now, if you are younger, the level of dishonesty might not be as obvious to you, but as someone who grew up in relatively honest times, I find it glaring.

And as someone who has lived in countries where cheating is common, I can also tell you that people lose the ability to discern truth from lies. They will cheat you and justify it, because they have lost the ability to discern a “white” lie from a lie.

It’s a fine line but I would say that a white lie is something you might tell someone in order not to hurt their feelings, but a lie is something you might tell someone to deceive them for your benefit.

It’s not as easy to raise a children in the post-modern climate—but there are strategies you can implement to ensure they grow up knowing the difference between right and wrong.

  1. Role Models

Good role models in a child’s life are essential. If the parents treat each other courteously, if they are respectful to their family and friends, if they are honest and helpful with others, their children are more likely to follow suit.

Always do what is right. It will gratify half of mankind and astound the other.
— Mark Twain

As far as honesty goes, this means we don’t skip paying for an item if the checker overlooked it, or we try to get a discounted price to a national park by lying about one of our children’s ages, or we tell someone we won’t be home when we will be home.

These are untruths that our children will take notice of and do as we do. We can’t model dishonesty and then fault our children when they aren’t honest with us.

2. Discipline

There is also a training through discipline that has to occur, too, as no child is born perfect no matter how good his or her parents may be.

Good wombs have borne bad sons.
— The Tempest, Shakespeare

You have a higher chance of having your children grow up to be civil people if you understand how to train them in the ways of good character. 

3. Public School

Public school can undo your hard work, though, because rudeness and crudeness are now more common, and teachers have little to no authority when it comes to correcting a child's behavior. 

Children sent to school for eight hours a day, where the teachers are not allowed to discipline them, are at an obvious disadvantage for developing healthy character traits.

On the contrary, children who spend their days in a homeschooled environment have a much greater advantage than schoolchildren. Guiding children in the ways of correct behavior is something any discerning homeschool parent can easily do.

Spare the rod, spoil the child, was an old adage that adults used to repeat before the 1960's cultural revolution when the time-tested principles of raising children were abandoned.

4. Modern Inconveniences

Today, we can add to the problem the modern inconvenience of vulgar films, ribald music; silly, literature; violent video games, rude social media behavior, and stupid television programs.

The environment a child grows up in will help to shape his character, which means that we want to be diligent with the kind of multimedia we expose our children to.

In a Nutshell

A child who grows up with the ability to discern truth from falsehood, beauty from ugliness, and good from bad is a child who was guided well in his youth.

Don’t miss our free downloadTen Books Every Well-Educated Child Should Read.

Teach your child to read before sending him to school! Learn more about Elizabeth's unique course, How to Teach Your Child to Read and Raise a Child Who Loves to Read.

For parents of children under age seven who would like to prepare their child for social and academic success, please begin with Elizabeth’s singular online course, Raise Your Child to Thrive in Life and Excel in Learning.

When you join the Smart Homeschooler Academy online course for parents, Elizabeth will make homeschooling manageable for you. She’ll guide you in helping your kids reach their intellectual potential and developing good character.

As a homeschooler, you will feel confident, calm, and motivated knowing you have the tools and support you need to homeschool successfully.

Elizabeth Y. Hanson is a homeschooling thought-leader and the founder of Smart Homeschooler.

As an Educator, Homeschool Emerita, Writer, and Love and Leadership Certified Parenting Coach, Elizabeth has 21+ years of experience working in education.

Developing a comprehensive understanding of how to raise and educate a child, she devotes her time to helping parents get it right.

Elizabeth is available for one-on-one consultations as needed.

"I know Elizabeth Y. Hanson as a remarkably intelligent, highly sensitive woman with a moral nature and deep insight into differences between schooling and education. Elizabeth's mastery of current educational difficulties is a testimony to her comprehensive understanding of the competing worlds of schooling and education. She has a good heart and a good head. What more can I say?”

John Taylor Gatto Distinguished educator, public speaker, and best-selling author of Dumbing Us Down: The Hidden Curriculum of Compulsory Schooling

4 Strategies to Raise Low-Tech Kids Who Excel Academically and Socially

We are now raising kids in a cultural environment that is not conducive to developing good social skills or well-trained minds.

Your biggest obstacle to raising solid kids today is technology. You will first need to understand just a little about how technology affects the growing brain, and then I’ll share my 3 strategies for raising kids who excel socially and academically.

Your Child’s Precious Brain Cells

Did you know your child is born with about 100 billion brain cells and that these cells make trillions of connections with one another during his first three years of life?

And did you know that those very connections form the foundation of his intelligence?

Yet, because of the overuse of technology, too many children are not receiving adequate stimulation during the pre-adolescent years which inhibits the formation of new neural pathways.

On top of that, if they don’t sufficiently use the pathways they have formed; the unused pathways will be sloughed off at adolescence.

Technology: ‘the knack of so arranging the world that we don’t have to experience it.
— Max Frisch, c.1960s

Simply put, despite the generous pediatric recommendations, if your child is in the habit of using technology, chances are there may be some delays and possible disruption to his developmental processes. 

I am going to be blunt with you: if your child is using technology, he may not become as intelligent as a child who has a tech-free childhood. It is the obvious conclusion when you understand how technology affects the growing brain. 

What Can A Parent Do?

With our children being targeted by educational software companies, and with the gaming industry's enormously powerful lobby, navigating a world with less technology does require some effort. 

It is possible and you can do it, however, you must be intentional if you want to raise an intelligent, ethical, critically-thinking child.

There are 4 things you can do which will protect your child mind, and by default, make your life easier. .

Strategy #1: Out of Sight, Out of Mind

The first action you can take is to remember that your children will not ask for technology if they don't see you using it or see it in the home.

Therefore, out of sight, out of mind

Host your television and computer in your bedroom and / or office, and, for the most part, keep yourself unplugged during the time that you spend with your children. 

As far as your home is concerned, it's really that simple.

I find television very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I go into the other room and read a book.
— Groucho Marx

Strategy #2: Going Against the Grain

When you visit friends, don't be shy to let them know that you are raising your children in a low-tech zone and that you prefer your children play with their kids rather than plugin together. 

After all, that’s why you brought them over—to play together.

When it comes to our children's well-being, we have to stand up for what is best for them, even if we get slack from others.

We have to remind ourselves that our child’s well-being is more important to us than what others think about our choices.

Fortunately, most intelligent and reasonable parents will respect your request. (If they don't, you may want to question the value of their friendship.)

Strategy #3: The Forbidden Apple Syndrome

Here is the crux of the matter, though: You absolutely must find like-minded family and friends to raise your children with.

You cannot be the only parent to say "no" to technology; otherwise, technology is exactly what your child will seek out the minute he leaves home. We call it the Forbidden Apple syndrome.

If you don’t find like-minded friends, your children will see you as the odd parent who doesn’t like technology.

If it keeps up, man will atrophy all his limbs but the push-button finger.
— Frank Lloyd Wright

Underneath this new attitude towards you will be one of disrespect. It's the curse of raising kids in the West where mainstream practices are not often what’s best for our children.

What if you can’t find like-minded friends? The sad answer is that you will probably have to compromise a little to avoid the Forbidden Apple syndrome.

#4 Homeschool Your Kids

When you homeschool your children, it is much easier to keep them off screens. As a homeschooler, you will hopefully raise strong readers, and strong readers excel academically.

Instead of giving your kids screens, you will give them real books.

Your child will develop better social skills by being homeschooled, too. He will not be exposed to the negative social environment so prevalent in schools today. Instead, you will raise him to have good manners and teach him how to get along with other people.

Good social skills are much easier to develop if a child is being homeschooled. It has been studied and proven to be true.

Therefore, keep your kids off of screens!

It must follow, as the night, the day,* they will do better academically and socially.


A line from Hamlet by William Shakespeare

Don’t miss our free downloadTen Books Every Well-Educated Child Should Read.

Teach your child to read before sending him to school! Learn more about Elizabeth's unique course, How to Teach Your Child to Read and Raise a Child Who Loves to Read.

For parents of children under age seven who would like to prepare their child for social and academic success, please begin with Elizabeth’s singular online course, Raise Your Child to Thrive in Life and Excel in Learning.

When you join the Smart Homeschooler Academy online course for parents, Elizabeth will make homeschooling manageable for you. She’ll guide you in helping your kids reach their intellectual potential and developing good character.

As a homeschooler, you will feel confident, calm, and motivated knowing you have the tools and support you need to homeschool successfully.

Elizabeth Y. Hanson is a homeschooling thought-leader and the founder of Smart Homeschooler.

As an Educator, Homeschool Emerita, Writer, and Love and Leadership Certified Parenting Coach, Elizabeth has 21+ years of experience working in education.

Developing a comprehensive understanding of how to raise and educate a child, she devotes her time to helping parents get it right.

Elizabeth is available for one-on-one consultations as needed.

"I know Elizabeth Y. Hanson as a remarkably intelligent, highly sensitive woman with a moral nature and deep insight into differences between schooling and education. Elizabeth's mastery of current educational difficulties is a testimony to her comprehensive understanding of the competing worlds of schooling and education. She has a good heart and a good head. What more can I say?”

John Taylor Gatto Distinguished educator, public speaker, and best-selling author of Dumbing Us Down: The Hidden Curriculum of Compulsory Schooling

10 Foolproof Ways to Convince Your Spouse (or Anyone) to Homeschool

If your husband or wife’s mind is already set against homeschooling, you have to approach the situation very gingerly. It’s not wise to push our views on someone, least of all a spouse.  

It is time that we squarely face the fact that institutional schoolteaching is destructive to children.
— John Taylor Gatto

Usually when a spouse doesn’t agree with homeschooling, it’s because he doesn’t understand what John Taylor Gatto refers to as "the dangers of public school."

The Conversation

But you can start the conversation by asking your spouse a question, such as, "What are your hopes and goals for our children’s education?"

You have now opened the channels for him to let you know his hopes and goals in a non-threatening way. As he shares these with you, listen for his concerns too.

Once you’ve got a friendly discussion going, approach the subject of homeschooling.

If you were to consider homeschooling, would he have any objections or concerns? If so, what would those be?

The Objections

The typical objections to homeschooling are the following:

  • The children will be academically behind and fail to get into a reputable college.

  • Homeschooled kids lack good social skills.

  • Homeschooled children don’t have any friends.

  • You aren’t qualified to homeschool unless you’re an accredited teacher.

  • You aren’t qualified to homeschool unless you have a college degree.

Maybe your husband doesn't know any homeschoolers and the idea sounds too fantastic to him?

Keep in mind that your spouse wants what is best for his children just as much as you do.

The Persuasion

Whatever his objections are, you want to take note and ask him if he would be open to watching some videos on the subject, looking at some research, or even reading some books together.

If you keep the conversation neutral and show a genuine interest in his views and concerns, most reasonable husbands will oblige their wives. 

Now, here comes the tricky part: you will need to provide him with information that is sound and relevant.

No need to panic though because we have you covered. You can download our free resource list to convince anyone about the merits of homeschooling.

The list will provide you with 10 resources to educate your husband (or anyone) about the the many problems with public school and why homeschooling is the best option today. 

This resource is also helpful if you have family members or friends who are strongly opposed to homeschooling.

Grab your free download here: 10 Resources to Convince Anyone About the Merits of Homeschooling.

Once someone truly understands what is fundamentally wrong with public school, it is near impossible to put a child into it unless the person has no other choice.

Some Cautionary Advice

Be careful about taking the attitude of proving your spouse wrong. No one likes to be proven wrong, and trying to show your spouse that you were right will not help your cause. 

Instead, you want to humble yourself and be gentle in the way you handle the situation.

Go slowly.

When someone has a fixed opinion, it’s prudent to allow time for that person to shift into a new mindset.

Start early by educating your spouse when your children are young.

By the time they are ready to go to school, hopefully, you'll both be excited about homeschooling! 

School is a twelve-year jail sentence where bad habits are the only curriculum truly learned. I teach school and win awards doing it. I should know.
— John Taylor Gatto

Don’t miss our free download, Ten Books Every Well-Educated Child Should Read.

Become a Smart Homeschooler to raise smart, ethical, and critically-thinking children. Join the Smart Homeschooler Academy online course and feel secure knowing that you have what you need to homeschool successfully as well as live ongoing support from Elizabeth.

For parents of children under age seven who would like to prepare their child for social and academic success, please begin with our online course, Raise Your Child Well to Thrive in Life and Excel in Learning.

Elizabeth Y. Hanson is an Educator, Homeschool Emerita, Writer, and a Love and Leadership Certified Parenting Coach with 20+ years of experience working in children’s education.

Utilizing her unusual skill set, coupled with her unique combination of mentors, Elizabeth has developed a comprehensive understanding of how to raise and educate a child. She devotes her time to helping parents get it right.

☞ Disclaimer: This is not a politically-correct blog.

Are You Educated Enough to Homeschool?

As women, we tend to think we are not enough just the way we are. Add homeschooling into the mix and our list of not enough now includes neither smart nor educated enough to homeschool.

The thought of homeschooling conjures up fears that we may fail, we may disappoint our families, and, worst of all, we may hinder our children's chances of success.

We wonder how other homeschooling moms do it?

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The truth is that even if you didn’t go to college, you could still succeed at homeschooling if you put your mind to it.

What follows is my defense that any well-intended parent—with the right understanding and the right tools—can do a better job educating her children than public school.

I'm Not Smart Enough, Nor Educated Enough

To this, I would ask, who is? My father was in the category of truly learned men of the 20th century, and he never considered himself educated. My father's position used to baffle me until one day I understood that the more you know, the more you can comprehend how little you know.

It’s an irony of life that the most simple questions contain the greatest mysteries.

Most homeschooling parents went through public school and did not start out with a good education.

However, it is never too late to correct this problem.

The good news is that when you homeschool, you will correct it by developing your mind alongside your children. Becoming more intellectually savvy is a by product of homeschooling.

So is developing your brain to a greater degree.

We used to think the brain became fixed at a certain age and didn’t change after that other than to decline as you aged, but neuroscientists have shown that this isn't true. The brain continues to wire itself which is why homeschooling also keeps our brains nimble. 

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When you have conversations with homeschooling moms, you'll find that they usually have a lot of general knowledge (if they do not have their kids in virtual schools). This is because the more children they have, the more they teach, and, therefore, the more general knowledge they gain—without even trying.

And don’t forget that we have many brilliant self-taught people in our history including William Blake, Frank Lloyd Wright, Mark Twain, The Wright Brothers, Benjamin Franklin, Alexander Hamilton, Karl Marx, and Frederick Douglass, to name a few.

We are so well-trained to believe in the magic paper one receives upon college graduation, that we forget most famous people in Western history were self-taught to some degree.

Libraries raised me. I don’t believe in colleges and universities. I believe in libraries because most students don’t have any money. When I graduated from high school, it was during the Depression and we had no money. I couldn’t go to college, so I went to the library three days a week for 10 years.
— Ray Bradbury, author

Even without a college education, you will still do a better job homeschooling your children than the public school system can do. In fact, if you have no college education, your kids may have a better chance of excelling academically if you homeschool them.

The reason for this is that parents with less education will not be able to help their children with homework, and these children will fall behind in school. Once the children fall behind, they begin to do poorly in school, putting them on a negative academic trajectory.

There were no significant differences in children’s SAT scores based on the education level of their parents. Mothers who had not completed high school were able to teach their children just as effectively as mothers with college degrees.
— NHERI

When you homeschool your children, you will have the books on hand to understand the material yourself, and you will make sure your child understands it before he moves onto the next lesson. He will not be under pressure to keep up with his classmates which will help him focus better and learn more.

What parent wants their child shuffled through a system where after 12 years of schooling, the child is still unprepared to do well in life?

Children learn what they live. Put kids in a class and they will live out their lives in an invisible cage, isolated from their chance at community; interrupt kids with bells and horns all the time and they will learn that nothing is important or worth finishing; ridicule them and they will retreat from human association; shame them and they will find a hundred ways to get even. The habits taught in large-scale organizations are deadly.
— John Taylor Gatto, Dumbing Us Down

One last thing, don’t forget that you are the person who loves your child the most and cares most about your child’s future. How can anyone else ever trump that?

So please, please, please do not let a feeling of intellectual inferiority stop you from homeschooling!

You will rise to the occasion and become a better educated person yourself because you were a homeschooler. 

And your children will have a solid foundation upon which to build the rest of the lives.

☞ Disclaimer: This is not a politically-correct blog.

Don’t miss our free download, Ten Books Every Well-Educated Child Should Read.

When you join the Smart Homeschooler Academy online course for parents, Elizabeth will guide you in homeschooling with the classics to raise brighter and more creative children.

Enroll using the link below and feel confident knowing you have the guidance and support you need to homeschool successfully.

For parents of children under age seven who would like to prepare their child for social and academic success, please begin with Elizabeth’s original online course, Raise Your Child to Thrive in Life and Excel in Learning.

Elizabeth Y. Hanson is a homeschooling thought-leader and the founder of Smart Homeschooler.

As an Educator, Homeschool Emerita, Writer, and Love and Leadership Certified Parenting Coach, Elizabeth has 21+ years of experience working in education.

She has developed a comprehensive understanding of how to raise and educate a child, and she devotes her time to helping parents to get it right.

Elizabeth is available for one-on-one consultations as needed.

*****

“Elizabeth has given us counseling and guidance to help us succeed with our home school planning. When I feel overwhelmed, scared, or lose my confidence, she offers words of wisdom and support.”

— Sherry B., Pittsburg, PA

The Six Purposes of Schooling by John Taylor Gatto

School bus.png

When people ask me why I homeschooled, I tell them I had no choice. If they knew what I know about public education, they would homeschool too.

John Taylor Gatto was the man who opened my eyes to the nefarious agenda behind institutionalized schooling. What follows is a transcription of the key section from John’s classic speech and opus, The Underground History of American Education.

John was a brilliant and well-researched man. I have read what is below in Ingles’ book myself; it is all true.   

Transcription of John’s Talk

“I have something here.  I have the six purposes of schooling [from the book Principles of Secondary Education by Alexander James Inglis] as laid down in 1917 by the man whom Harvard named their Honor Lecture in Education for. 

So far from being a fringe individual, this guy is the reason the Harvard Honor Lecture in Education is named as it is:  The Inglis Lecture.  I would like to read you the six purposes of schooling.  I moved heaven and earth as it took years to find this book [Principles of Secondary Education]--just like trying to find in past years a copy of the Carol Quigley [book] Tragedy and Hope.  

I learned about Inglis from a twenty year President of Harvard [1933-1953], James Bryant Conant, who was a poison gas specialist in World War I--and was in the very inner circle of the Atomic Bomb Project in World War II--was High Commissioner of Occupied Germany after the War. 

So he [James Bryant Conant] wrote--there must be 20 books about the institution of schooling--of which he was completely a proponent.  And he is a very, very bad writer.  I forced myself to read most of these books, and one of them he says that if you really want to know what school is about, you need to pick up the book that I’m referring to Principles of Secondary Education

Two years it took me to find a copy of the book [Principles of Secondary Education by Alexander James Inglis]--750 pages, tiny print and as dull as your imagination can be.  And furthermore, it is not till you get to the very middle of the book--in an unlabelled section--that he spills the beans.  Let me spill them for you.  

 There are six purposes, or functions, as he calls them.  The first he [Alexander Inglis] calls the Adjustive Function: Schools are to establish fixed habits of reaction to authority.  That’s their main purpose--habits and reactions to authority. 

That is why school authorities don’t tear their hair out when somebody exposes that the Atomic Bomb wasn’t dropped on Korea, as a history book in the 1990s printed by Scott Foresman [did], and why each of these books has hundreds of substantive errors.  Learning isn’t the reason the texts are distributed.  

The Adjustive Function

So, first is the Adjustive Function--fixed habits.  Now here comes the wonderful insight that being able to analyze the detail will give you.  How can you establish whether someone has successfully developed this Automatic Reaction because people have a proclivity when they are given sensible orders to follow. 

That is not what they want to teach.  The only way you can measure this is to give stupid orders and people automatically follow those.  Now you have achieved Function #1.  

The Integrating Function

Have you ever ever wondered why some of the foolish things that schools do or allow to continue?  [Function] #2, he [Inglis] calls it the Integrating Function, but it is easier to understand if you call it the Conformity Function. 

It’s to make children alike as possible--the gifted children and the stupid--alike as possible because market research uses statistical sampling, and it only works if people react generally the same way.  

The Directive Function

The Third Function he calls the Directive Function: School is to diagnose your proper social role and then log the evidence that here is where you are on the Great Pyramid, so that future people won’t allow you to escape that compartment.  

The Differentiating Function

 The Fourth Function is the Differentiating Function.  Because once you have diagnosed the kids in this layer, you do not want them to learn anything that the higher layers are learning.  So you teach just as far as the requirement of that layer.  

The Selective Function

 Number five and six are the creepiest of all!  Number 5 is the Selective Function.  What that means is what Darwin meant by natural selection: You are assessing the breeding quality of each individual kid.  You’re doing it structurally because school teachers don’t know this is happening. 

And you’re trying to use ways to prevent the poor stuff from breeding.  And those ways are hanging labels--humiliating labels--around their neck, encouraging the shallowness of thinking.

 I often wondered, because I came from a very very strict Scotish-Irish culture that never allowed you to leer at a girl.  But when I got to NYC, the boys were pawing the girls openly and there was no redress for the girls at all, except not showing up in the classroom--high absentee rates. 

Well, you are supposed to teach structurally that sexual pleasure is what you withdraw from a relationship and everything else is a waste of time and expensive.  

 So, the Selective Function is what Darwin meant by the favored races.  The idea is to consciously improve the breeding stock.  Schools are meant to tag the unfit with their inferiority by poor grades, remedial placement, and humiliation, so that their peers will accept them as inferior.  And the good breeding stock among the females will reject them as possible partners.  

The Propaedeutic Function

 And the Sixth is the creepiest of all! And I think it is partly what Tragedy and Hope is about--a fancy Roman name, the Propaedeutic Function.  Because as early as Roman bigtime thinkers, it was understood that to continue a social form required that some people be trained that they were the custodians of this.  So, some small fraction of the kids are being ready to take over the project. 

That’s the guy--the honor lecturer [Inglis], and it will not surprise you that his ancestors include the major-general of the siege of the Luknow of India--famous for tying the mutineers’ on the muzzle of the cannons and blowing them apart, or somebody who was forced to flee NYC, a churchman at the beginning of the American Revolution, because he wrote a refutation of Thomas Paine’s Common Sense. 

They were going to tar and feather him.  He fled and was rewarded by the British by making him the Bishop of Nova Scotia.  Those are Inglis’ ancestors!  

 So, Al Inglis is certainly--when I learned of this and wrote to Harvard, asking for access to the Inglis Lecture.  Strike me dead, Lord, if I’m exaggerating at all.  I was told “We have no Inglis Lecture--hasn’t been for years, and we have no records. 

It was the same that happened when I discovered that Elwood B. Cubberly, the most influential schoolman of the 20th century and the bionomics genius had been the elementary school editor of Houghton Mifflin, and I wrote Houghton Mifflin--Is there any record? And they said, “We have no record of anyone named Elwood P. Cubberly. 

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Now Harvard is telling me, “There is no Inglis Lecture.  A week passed and I got a call from Harvard, from some obscure office at Harvard, saying “What is your interest in the Ingles Lecture?”  I knew that I was on thin ice. 

And I said, “Well, James Conant referred me in his books to the man the Inglis Lecture is named after, and I was just wondering if I could get some background on this fellow, and a list of the lectures.  

 And in due time, I got a list of the lectures and instructions [on] how to access the texts, but not easily. Enough hoops that someone who has to mow the lawn and burp the baby wouldn’t jump through those hoops.  I was able to prove Harper’s [magazine] wouldn’t publish [it in] the cover essay I wrote, which Lew Laflin [?] named Against School, but I had called The Artificial Extension of Childhood because I think that is the key mechanism at work here.  

 So, they wouldn’t print the information about Cubberley because Houghton Mifflin denied it.  It was only months after that I looked through my extensive library of incredibly dull books about schooling, and I opened [one]--and on the facing page said Elwood B. Cubberly, Editor and Chief of Elementary School, publishing arm of Houghton Mifflin. 

By the way, the secondary Editor and Chief was Alexander Ingles.  So you see how this cousinage works.” 

*****

Download your free copy of 10 Surprising Facts About Homeschooled Kids.

*Video transcribed by Roger Copple. To watch the full 12-minute video: The Six Purposes of Schooling [Video]

☞ Disclaimer: This is not a politically-correct blog.

Don’t miss our free download, Ten Books Every Well-Educated Child Should Read.

When you join the Smart Homeschooler Academy online course for parents, Elizabeth will guide you in homeschooling with the classics to raise brighter and more creative children.

Enroll using the link below and feel confident knowing you have the guidance and support you need to homeschool successfully.

For parents of children under age seven who would like to prepare their child for social and academic success, please begin with Elizabeth’s original online course, Raise Your Child to Thrive in Life and Excel in Learning.

Elizabeth Y. Hanson is a homeschooling thought-leader and the founder of Smart Homeschooler.

As an Educator, Homeschool Emerita, Writer, and Love and Leadership Certified Parenting Coach, Elizabeth has 21+ years of experience working in education.

She has developed a comprehensive understanding of how to raise and educate a child, and she devotes her time to helping parents to get it right.

Elizabeth is available for one-on-one consultations as needed.

*****

“Elizabeth has given us counseling and guidance to help us succeed with our home school planning. When I feel overwhelmed, scared, or lose my confidence, she offers words of wisdom and support.”

— Sherry B., Pittsburg, PA

How to Build the Pursuit of Excellence into Your Homeschool Plan

How to Build the Pursuit of Excellence into Your Homeschool Plan

Public school promotes mediocrity; as homeschoolers, we want our kids to excel.

Therefore, establishing concrete goals is a part of every successful homeschooler’s plan. And whatever educational goals you set, it is vital that you create the steps for your child to reach these goals.

Read More

10 Resources to Convince Your Spouse (or anyone) About the Merits of Homeschooling

All hope is not lost. There are things you can do, and I’m going to share those with you shortly. But first, it’s important to understand why a spouse (or anyone) might resist the idea of homeschooling.

Usually, a spouse doesn't agree with homeschooling because they don’t understand what John Taylor Gatto would refer to as "the dangers of public school."

It is time that we squarely face the fact that institutional schoolteaching is destructive to children.
— John Taylor Gatto

If your husband’s mind is already set against homeschooling, you have to approach the situation very gingerly. You cannot push your views on someone, least of all your husband.  

But you can start the conversation by asking him this question: "Tell me what your goals are when you think of the education of our children?" And then follow up with this question: "What would it take for you to feel comfortable about homeschooling our children?" 

You have now opened the channels for him to let you know his goals and concerns in a non-threatening way. Listen carefully and understand that he wants what is best for his children as you do.

He is not coming from a place of belligerence but of genuine concern. 

Your husband will probably bring up objections such as he's concerned they won't get what they need academically, which will hurt their chances of getting into a good college.

He may say that he's worried about the socialization factor and that he doesn't want his kids to grow up to be social misfits. He might say that you aren't an accredited teacher and therefore not qualified to teach your own children.

Maybe he doesn't know any homeschoolers, and the idea sounds too fantastic to him?

He also might express concern for character development and key qualities he wants his kids to have such as creativity, integrity, moral values, resilience, and discipline (all of which the kids will most likely not get in school).

School is a twelve-year jail sentence where bad habits are the only curriculum truly learned. I teach school and win awards doing it. I should know.
— John Taylor Gatto

Whatever his objections are, you want to take note and ask him if he would be open to watching some videos on the subject, looking at some research, or even reading some books together?

If you keep the conversation non-threatening and show a genuine interest in his views and concerns, most reasonable husbands will oblige their wives. 

Now, this is the tricky part because you will need to provide him with information that is sound and to the point. I'm going to share some resources that should help you educate your husband (or anyone) about the unparalleled benefits of homeschooling and the many problems with public school. 

Grab your free resource here: 10 Resources to Convince Anyone About the Merits of Homeschooling.

This resource is also helpful if you have family members or friends who are strongly opposed to homeschooling.

Some points to remember:

Be careful about taking the attitude of proving your spouse wrong. No one likes to be proven wrong, and trying to show your spouse that you were right will not help your cause. Instead, you want to humble yourself and be gentle in the way you handle the situation.

Go slowly.

When someone has a fixed opinion, it’s prudent to allow time for that person to shift into a new mindset. Start early by educating your spouse when your children are young, and by the time they are ready to go to school, hopefully, you'll both be excited about homeschooling! 

Don’t miss our free download, Ten Books Every Well-Educated Child Should Read.

Become a Smart Homeschooler to raise smart, ethical, and critically-thinking children. Join the Smart Homeschooler Academy online course and feel secure knowing that you have what you need to homeschool successfully as well as live ongoing support from Elizabeth.

For parents of children under age seven who would like to prepare their child for social and academic success, please begin with our online course, Raise Your Child Well to Thrive in Life and Excel in Learning.

Elizabeth Y. Hanson is an Educator, Homeschool Emerita, Writer, and a Love and Leadership Certified Parenting Coach with 20+ years of experience working in children’s education.

Utilizing her unusual skill set, coupled with her unique combination of mentors, Elizabeth has developed a comprehensive understanding of how to raise and educate a child. She devotes her time to helping parents get it right.

☞ Disclaimer: This is not a politically-correct blog.

4 Strategies to Raise Children of Good Character

Societal influences can make it easier or more difficult to raise a decent child who is well-mannered, respectful, and obedient.

In today’s social and political climate it’s not always that easy, but there are some things you can do to ensure a better outcome for your family.

When our children are young, we want to train them to do the right thing, so they develop the right habits in childhood and learn to make the right choices.

Always do what is right. It will gratify half of mankind and astound the other.
— Mark Twain

It begins with little things such as learning to pick up after themselves, doing chores before they play, being considerate of other people's needs, and having good manners.

Role Models

Good role models in a child’s life are essential. If the parents treat each other courteously, if they are respectful to their family and friends, if they are honest and helpful with others, their children are more likely to follow suit.

Discipline

There is also a training through discipline that has to occur, too, as no child is born perfect no matter how good his or her role models may be.

Good parents can produce bad children; there are no guarantees that children turn out well.

You have a higher chance of having them grow up to be good people, however, if you understand how to train them in the ways of respect and obedience. 

Public School

Public school can undo your hard work, though, because rudeness and crudeness are now the norms, and the teachers have very little authority when it comes to correcting a child's behavior. 

Children sent to school for eight hours a day where the teachers are not allowed to discipline them are at a disadvantage.

On the contrary, children who spend their days in a homeschooled environment are with adults who are able to put the time and effort into guiding the kids in the right ways.

In a home or private schools, adults have authority over the children and can discipline them as needed. The right training in childhood is essential to raising a well-mannered, happy child.

Spare the rod, spoil the child, was an old adage that adults used to repeat before the 60's cultural revolution when sound parenting principles were abandoned in favor of unproven, untested theories about how to raise a kid.

Modern Inconveniences

Today, we can add to the problem modern inconveniences such as vulgar films, ribald music, video games, social media, and inappropriate television programs.

Negative influences will unravel any good work you've done to raise your children well, which is why we need to be diligent with the environments we let influence our children.

The Ancient Greeks knew that negative influences in a child's life would help mold their character, and any educator since who has studied the classics or has an ounce of common sense will understand this too.

The rest of society has forgotten it, though, making us negligent in our duty to raise our children according to time-tested principles that work. 

A Dishonest Trend

Ninety-seven percent of schoolchildren are dishonest according to statistics gathered by Vickie Abeles, who produced the documentary, Race to Nowhere.

Even without the statistics, it doesn't take a brain surgeon to figure out that we are no longer an honest society. 

My son took a statistics exam online only to receive an email from the teacher the following day, announcing that some of the students had cheated on the exam.

My son said the exam was easy, too, making it an even more pathetic situation. College students cheating on an easy exam?

I’m not upset that you lied to me, I’m upset that from now on I can’t believe you.
— Friedrich Nietzsche

What happened to the concept of hard work and honesty?

Cheating is a habit for many children today.

When the lines between honesty and dishonesty become so blurred that cheating on exams becomes all too common, we have a serious problem. Cheaters are cheaters. Liars are liars. School doesn't end and real life begin to find these students suddenly turn honest again. 

They have become dishonest people. Their characters have formed this way because they are raised in a system that doesn't uphold the values of truth, goodness, and beauty; once so honored in the West.

In a Nutshell

Raise your children well, keep them out of public school, screen multi-media use when they are young (or eliminate it!), avoid inappropriate music, and surround them with natural beauty and good people.

If you do, you'll have accomplished something that is becoming more and more uncommon today; you’ll have raised a decent child.

A child who grows up with the ability to discern truth from falsehood, beauty from ugliness, and good from bad is a child you can be proud to call your own.

Don’t miss our free download, Ten Books Every Well-Educated Child Should Read.

Become a Smart Homeschooler to raise smart, ethical, and critically-thinking children. Join the Smart Homeschooler Academy online course and feel secure knowing that you have what you need to homeschool successfully as well as live ongoing support from Elizabeth.

For parents of children under age seven who would like to prepare their child for social and academic success, please begin with our online course, Raise Your Child Well to Thrive in Life and Excel in Learning.

Elizabeth Y. Hanson is an Educator, Homeschool Emerita, Writer, and a Love and Leadership Certified Parenting Coach with 20 years of experience working in children’s education.

Utilizing her unusual skill set, coupled with her unique combination of mentors, Elizabeth has developed a comprehensive understanding of how to raise and educate a child. She devotes her time to helping parents get it right.

☞ Disclaimer: This is not a politically-correct blog.

The Six Purposes of Schooling by John Taylor Gatto

School bus.png

When people have asked me why I homeschooled, I tell them I had no choice. I tell them that if they understood what I understand about public education, they would homeschool too. John Taylor Gatto was the man who opened my eyes to the nefarious agenda behind public school.

What follows is a transcription of the key section from John’s classic speech and opus, The Underground History of American Education. John was a brilliant and well-researched man. I have read what is below in Ingles’ book myself; it is all true.   

Transcription of John’s Talk

“I have something here.  I have the six purposes of schooling [from the book Principles of Secondary Education by Alexander James Inglis] as laid down in 1917 by the man whom Harvard named their Honor Lecture in Education for. 

So far from being a fringe individual, this guy is the reason the Harvard Honor Lecture in Education is named as it is:  The Inglis Lecture.  I would like to read you the six purposes of schooling.  I moved heaven and earth as it took years to find this book [Principles of Secondary Education]--just like trying to find in past years a copy of the Carol Quigley [book] Tragedy and Hope.  

I learned about Inglis from a twenty year President of Harvard [1933-1953], James Bryant Conant, who was a poison gas specialist in World War I--and was in the very inner circle of the Atomic Bomb Project in World War II--was High Commissioner of Occupied Germany after the War. 

So he [James Bryant Conant] wrote--there must be 20 books about the institution of schooling--of which he was completely a proponent.  And he is a very, very bad writer.  I forced myself to read most of these books, and one of them he says that if you really want to know what school is about, you need to pick up the book that I’m referring to Principles of Secondary Education

Two years it took me to find a copy of the book [Principles of Secondary Education by Alexander James Inglis]--750 pages, tiny print and as dull as your imagination can be.  And furthermore, it is not till you get to the very middle of the book--in an unlabelled section--that he spills the beans.  Let me spill them for you.  

 There are six purposes, or functions, as he calls them.  The first he [Alexander Inglis] calls the Adjustive Function: Schools are to establish fixed habits of reaction to authority.  That’s their main purpose--habits and reactions to authority. 

That is why school authorities don’t tear their hair out when somebody exposes that the Atomic Bomb wasn’t dropped on Korea, as a history book in the 1990s printed by Scott Foresman [did], and why each of these books has hundreds of substantive errors.  Learning isn’t the reason the texts are distributed.  

The Adjustive Function

So, first is the Adjustive Function--fixed habits.  Now here comes the wonderful insight that being able to analyze the detail will give you.  How can you establish whether someone has successfully developed this Automatic Reaction because people have a proclivity when they are given sensible orders to follow. 

That is not what they want to teach.  The only way you can measure this is to give stupid orders and people automatically follow those.  Now you have achieved Function #1.  

The Integrating Function

Have you ever ever wondered why some of the foolish things that schools do or allow to continue?  [Function] #2, he [Inglis] calls it the Integrating Function, but it is easier to understand if you call it the Conformity Function. 

It’s to make children alike as possible--the gifted children and the stupid--alike as possible because market research uses statistical sampling, and it only works if people react generally the same way.  

The Directive Function

The Third Function he calls the Directive Function: School is to diagnose your proper social role and then log the evidence that here is where you are on the Great Pyramid, so that future people won’t allow you to escape that compartment.  

The Differentiating Function

 The Fourth Function is the Differentiating Function.  Because once you have diagnosed the kids in this layer, you do not want them to learn anything that the higher layers are learning.  So you teach just as far as the requirement of that layer.  

The Selective Function

 Number five and six are the creepiest of all!  Number 5 is the Selective Function.  What that means is what Darwin meant by natural selection: You are assessing the breeding quality of each individual kid.  You’re doing it structurally because school teachers don’t know this is happening. 

And you’re trying to use ways to prevent the poor stuff from breeding.  And those ways are hanging labels--humiliating labels--around their neck, encouraging the shallowness of thinking.

 I often wondered, because I came from a very very strict Scotish-Irish culture that never allowed you to leer at a girl.  But when I got to NYC, the boys were pawing the girls openly and there was no redress for the girls at all, except not showing up in the classroom--high absentee rates. 

Well, you are supposed to teach structurally that sexual pleasure is what you withdraw from a relationship and everything else is a waste of time and expensive.  

 So, the Selective Function is what Darwin meant by the favored races.  The idea is to consciously improve the breeding stock.  Schools are meant to tag the unfit with their inferiority by poor grades, remedial placement, and humiliation, so that their peers will accept them as inferior.  And the good breeding stock among the females will reject them as possible partners.  

The Propaedeutic Function

 And the Sixth is the creepiest of all! And I think it is partly what Tragedy and Hope is about--a fancy Roman name, the Propaedeutic Function.  Because as early as Roman bigtime thinkers, it was understood that to continue a social form required that some people be trained that they were the custodians of this.  So, some small fraction of the kids are being ready to take over the project. 

That’s the guy--the honor lecturer [Inglis], and it will not surprise you that his ancestors include the major-general of the siege of the Luknow of India--famous for tying the mutineers’ on the muzzle of the cannons and blowing them apart, or somebody who was forced to flee NYC, a churchman at the beginning of the American Revolution, because he wrote a refutation of Thomas Paine’s Common Sense. 

They were going to tar and feather him.  He fled and was rewarded by the British by making him the Bishop of Nova Scotia.  Those are Inglis’ ancestors!  

 So, Al Inglis is certainly--when I learned of this and wrote to Harvard, asking for access to the Inglis Lecture.  Strike me dead, Lord, if I’m exaggerating at all.  I was told “We have no Inglis Lecture--hasn’t been for years, and we have no records. 

It was the same that happened when I discovered that Elwood B. Cubberly, the most influential schoolman of the 20th century and the bionomics genius had been the elementary school editor of Houghton Mifflin, and I wrote Houghton Mifflin--Is there any record? And they said, “We have no record of anyone named Elwood P. Cubberly. 

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Now Harvard is telling me, “There is no Inglis Lecture.  A week passed and I got a call from Harvard, from some obscure office at Harvard, saying “What is your interest in the Ingles Lecture?”  I knew that I was on thin ice. 

And I said, “Well, James Conant referred me in his books to the man the Inglis Lecture is named after, and I was just wondering if I could get some background on this fellow, and a list of the lectures.  

 And in due time, I got a list of the lectures and instructions [on] how to access the texts, but not easily. Enough hoops that someone who has to mow the lawn and burp the baby wouldn’t jump through those hoops.  I was able to prove Harper’s [magazine] wouldn’t publish [it in] the cover essay I wrote, which Lew Laflin [?] named Against School, but I had called The Artificial Extension of Childhood because I think that is the key mechanism at work here.  

 So, they wouldn’t print the information about Cubberley because Houghton Mifflin denied it.  It was only months after that I looked through my extensive library of incredibly dull books about schooling, and I opened [one]--and on the facing page said Elwood B. Cubberly, Editor and Chief of Elementary School, publishing arm of Houghton Mifflin. 

By the way, the secondary Editor and Chief was Alexander Ingles.  So you see how this cousinage works.” 

*****

Download your free copy of 10 Surprising Facts About Homeschooled Kids.

*Video transcribed by Roger Copple. To watch the full 12-minute video: The Six Purposes of Schooling [Video]

Don’t miss our free download, Ten Books Every Well-Educated Child Should Read.

Become a Smart Homeschooler, literally, and give your child a first-rate, screen-free education at home and enjoy doing it. Join the Smart Homeschooler Academy online course.

For parents of children under age seven, Raise Your Child Well to Live a Triumphant Life, course will be open again sometime in March, 2021.

Elizabeth Y. Hanson is an educator, veteran homeschooler, a lover of the classics, and a Love and Leadership certified parenting coach with 19 years of experience working in children’s education.

Utilizing her unusual skill set, coupled with the unique mentors she was fortunate to have, Elizabeth has developed a comprehensive understanding of how to raise and educate a child. She devotes her time to helping parents get it right.

☞ Disclaimer: This is not a politically-correct blog.

Goodbye, Mr. Potato Head

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Mr. Potato Head is losing his gender, at least on the box he comes in. Moving forward, he will be known only as Potato Head.

It's a little confusing, so let me explain: he's still a Mister in the box but not on the box.

Apparently there were a lot of articles that emerged Friday morning spreading fast the news that the toy company, Hasbro, who created the character of Mr. Potato Head in the 1950s, was going gender-neutral.

But then, the news article I was reading, by CNN, was updated later when Hasbro tweeted that the brand name had changed but not the characters.

I was relieved to learn that. 

When I was young, we had a funny sitcom about a talking horse called Mister Ed. After reading the Potato Head article, I was trying to imagine what would happen if Mister Ed became just Ed, but then that's a man's name.

And that got me thinking, exactly how would the TV producers handle Mister Ed today? Would they have to change his name? And what would they change it to since names from the beginning of time have always been based on gender? 

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And what about adults? When I was young, children still addressed grown-ups with titles such as, Mr. Jones or Mrs. Smith. Since we were not allowed to call an adult by their first name, what would we have done if the gender issue had existed then?

Would we have had to drop the Mr. and Mrs. when we spoke to an adult? As calling an adult by their last name was rude, dropping the titles would have put us in another bind.

My daughter told me at gender-neutral Berkeley, on the first day of her classes, the professors ask each student to state their pronoun preference. Some classes have as many as 300-400 students.

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This perplexed me because I wondered how the teacher would then keep all of that straight? If the professor has to know what the pronoun preference for each student is, does that mean that every time they need to use someone's pronoun they have to look at their roster, find the person's name, see their pronoun preference, and then speak? 

As I considered this, I couldn't help but think about the cost of tuition and how much class time this must take up?

Anyhow, I continued reading the article and found that Mattel, the maker of Barbie dolls, also wanted to introduce "a multi-dimensional view of beauty and fashion." To accomplish this, they introduced new dolls with disabilities, hair loss, and “vitigilio.”

I'm not sure what vitigilio is but I know that vitiligo is related to a disease affecting the skin pigmentation. 

Either way, it reminded me of a time when I was waiting to get my primary health care license in Chinese medicine. I worked for a company that sold a product for treating hair loss based on Chinese herbs. One day I was in a salon talking about the product to the owner when one of her customers came in. 

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The customer, an attractive young woman, was invited into the back room by the owner.  While I didn't understand why she had been invited to join our conversation, she understood. She asked me if she could show me something. I said that she could.

She pulled her hair off and was completely bald. To clarify, her hair was a wig; she had no hair. She suffered from a disease called alopecia which causes all of a person's hair to fall out.

It was a shock to witness this, and I'm sorry, Mattel, but it was not at all beautiful. So when Mattel says they want to promote “beauty and fashion” by making a doll with thinning hair, again, I'm confused. Women and men spend billions of dollars each year to not have thinning and balding hair. 

Does Mattel not know this?

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Potato Head aside, what all this confusion indicates to me is that we are beginning to lose a grip on a reality that we have agreed upon since the beginning of time. 

We are not thinking rationally and logically because we have been dumbed down by an educational system being manipulated by the corporate world since the mid-1800's and which now includes tycoons like Bill Gates. 

Gates has far more global power today than any one man should ever have. Where are the checks and balances for such unrestrained greed and lust for power?

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And is it a coincidence that he largely funded the development of a national curriculum, and that most schoolchildren are now at home learning online?

It's pretty amazing if it is. 

If I were a young parent today, I would reflect on your child's exposure to the gender conversation very seriously, and I would do several things to protect them from it and anything related to it. 

Understand that this nefarious social conditioning taking place in school and the media is inevitably destined to alter their understanding of what is beautiful, good, and true.  

I want to share my 8 Steps to Protect Your Child's Heart and Mind with you, but before I do I need to make a request. Please resist the inclination to ignore them because you think they are too extreme.

It is precisely extreme measures we must take to win this battle because we are too far out in left field now. 

Personally, I don't care what people do behind closed doors, and I believe that each human being possesses an inherent dignity that is worthy of respect, but I have to draw a line when aggressive marketing campaigns are launched to literally alter our perception of reality in order to satisfy a very small group of people.

If you want to protect your children and are ready to be proactive, here is a downloadable list of 8 things you can do to make sure what's beautiful, good, and true in life remains beautiful, good, and true in your children's eyes too.

Beauty. Goodness. Truth. Now those are ideals worth pondering; those are ideals worth striving for.

On a final note, you can save your money because Potato Head is a toy not worth buying. He occupies your children's time for about five minutes and then they get bored. My kids played far longer with two sticks that cost me nothing than they ever did with Mr. Potato Head.

Still, I don't like to see the Mr. of Potato Head removed from the box.

Don’t miss our free download, Ten Books Every Well-Educated Child Should Read.

Become a Smart Homeschooler, literally, and give your child a first-rate, screen-free education at home and enjoy doing it. Join the Smart Homeschooler Academy online course.

For parents of children under age seven, Raise Your Child Well to Live a Triumphant Life, is where you want to start.

Elizabeth Y. Hanson is an educator, veteran homeschooler, a lover of the classics, and a Love and Leadership certified parenting coach with 19 years of experience working in children’s education.

Utilizing her unusual skill set, coupled with the unique mentors she was fortunate to have, Elizabeth has developed a comprehensive understanding of how to raise and educate a child. She devotes her time to helping parents get it right.

Disclaimer: This is not a politically-correct blog.

One Method to Raise Courageous Children and Catapult Their Careers

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Courage is a great virtue and one every successful person embodies. But it’s an often misunderstood virtue.

Many people think courage is a lack of fear, but courageous people experience fear. The difference is that courageous people will act despite their fear whereas cowards will succumb to their fear and be unable to act. 

Courage is resistance to fear, mastery of fear - not absence of fear.
— Mark Twain

Life, to be lived to its fullest, has challenges and obstacles that we must all face and learn to overcome. If we let our fear conquer our minds, we will struggle to live purposeful lives because cowardice is paralyzing.

It will stop us from making decisions or acting in ways that will propel us forward in our life's true purpose.

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If you want your child to embrace his life, to live life to its fullest, to realize his life's work and purpose, then you have to allow him to take risks in childhood and learn to overcome the obstacles and challenges that he'll face. There are physical challenges he must overcome as well as challenges of the mind. 

The mental challenges are the more difficult to overcome because man is a master at self-delusion. But we can help our children learn to face them with courage when they are young, to overcome them when they are older.

You cannot swim for new horizons until you have courage to lose sight of the shore.
— William Faulkner

The greatest fear of the mind is the fear of performance, otherwise known as the fear of looking stupid. There are ways your child can confront this fear in youth so it does not immobilize him when he is older.

Give your child a head start developing the confidence to perform by having him perform for audiences during his childhood. There are various situations you can put your child into to give him the practice he needs to overcome this fear. If you can do this for him, he'll be at a great advantage in his life.

It takes courage to grow up and become who you really are.
— E.E. Cummings

Here are three situations to consider for your child to help him discover the stuff he is made of, his "mettle," as Homer would say.

Music

The first is by having him learn a musical instrument and performing in music recitals. Find a music teacher who provides recitals for the children at least twice a year. If you find a teacher you like, but the teacher does not provide recitals, suggest he or she does and offer to help organize the recitals. If this fails, then continue looking until you find a competent teacher who does provide recitals. 

Music recitals are extremely important for children because they develop the confidence they need to walk out onto a stage and perform under pressure. In the beginning, it will be difficult for them but, when they are very young, they have the advantage of being less self-conscious.

Children also tend to have less of an opinion about things when they are younger, so they'll be more willing to perform when they understand that it's expected of them. 

 As they grow older, with enough practice, they'll get used to performing for others and be able to bring joy to people through their music. While they may feel nervous before they start to play, they will understand that their fear is not a reason to cower down; they will learn to act despite it. 

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Poetry

As part of your child's education, have him memorize poetry. Once a month, get together with other families whose children are also engaged in memory work and do a joint recital. Let each child have a turn coming to the stage and reciting by heart the poem he learned.

Afterward, have tea and cookies and let the children enjoy their accomplishments together. The goal is to let it be an event they can look back on with fondness while they are developing confidence in learning to perform. 

Projects

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Have a quarterly or bi-annual project night where children speak on some aspect of history or science through a project they made. This is not only a good opportunity for them to learn to ignore their fear and learn to perform well, but it is a great academic learning and teaching opportunity too. 

There are other things you can do to help your child gain confidence in performing when he is young; still, these suggestions are a place for you to begin thinking about the kind of opportunities that will help your child gain confidence in his ability to perform well. 

Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts.
— Winston S. Churchill

If you can do this for him, you will have helped him learn that fear is not a reason for inaction; we act despite our fear when there is something worth doing. The more we act, the more courageous we become.

When your child is young, let me offer you a word of caution: do not let him get into the habit of always being the center of attention. Teaching your child to perform and indulging a child in excessive attention are two very different things.

One leads to courage, and the other leads to self-centeredness. 

Your goal is to raise him to be courageous and to be able to rise to the occasion when life demands it of him. This is the beginning of the journey to living a life of purpose.

The great sage Rumi said that every person was born with a desire for some work in his heart. Raise your child to be courageous so he can discover that work. 

Don’t miss our free download, Ten Books Every Well-Educated Child Should Read.

Become a Smart Homeschooler, literally, and give your child a first-rate, screen-free education at home and enjoy doing it. Join the Smart Homeschooler Academy online course.

Free Download: How to Raise a More Intelligent Child and an Excellent Reader—a reading guide and book list with 80+ carefully chosen titles.

Elizabeth Y. Hanson is an educator, veteran homeschooler, and a Love and Leadership certified parenting coach with 19 years of experience working in children’s education.

Utilizing her unusual skill set, coupled with the unique mentors she was fortunate to have, Elizabeth has developed a comprehensive understanding of how to raise and educate a child. She devotes her time to helping parents get it right.

Disclaimer: This is not a politically-correct blog.

4 Keys to Raise a Decent Child in Indecent Times

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Societal influences can make it easier or more difficult to raise a decent child. In today’s climate, it’s not always that easy, but there are some things you can do to ensure a better outcome.

When our children are young, we want to train them to do the right thing, so they develop the right habits in childhood and learn to make the right choices.

Always do what is right. It will gratify half of mankind and astound the other.
— Mark Twain

It begins with little things such as learning to pick up after themselves, doing chores before they play, being considerate of other people's needs, and having good manners.

Role Models

Good role models in a child’s life are essential too. If the parents treat each other courteously, if they are respectful to their family and friends, if they are honest and helpful with others, their children are more likely to follow suit.

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Discipline

There is also a training through discipline that has to occur, too, as no child is born perfect no matter how good his or her role models may be.

Good parents can produce bad children; there are no guarantees that children turn out well.

You have a higher chance of having them grow up to be good people, however, if you understand how to train them in the ways of respect and obedience. 

Public School

Public school can undo your hard work, though, because rudeness and crudeness are now the norms, and the teachers have very little authority when it comes to correcting the children's behavior. 

This is telling in and of itself. Children sent to school for eight hours a day where the teachers are not allowed to discipline them are at a disadvantage to children who aren't.

In a home or private schools, adults have authority over the children and can discipline them as needed. The right training in childhood is essential to raising a well-mannered, happy child.

Spare the rod, spoil the child, was an old adage that adults used to repeat before the 60's cultural revolution when sound parenting principles were abandoned in favor of unproven new theories.

Modern Inconveniences

Today, we can add to the problem modern inconveniences such as vulgar films, ribald music, video games, social media, and inappropriate television programs, and you have a recipe for disappointment with your children.

Negative influences will unravel any good work you've done to raise your children well, which is why we need to be diligent with the environments we let influence our children.

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The Ancient Greeks knew that negative influences in a child's life would help mold their character, and any educator since who has studied the classics or has an ounce of common sense, understands this too.

The rest of society has forgotten it, though, making us negligent in our duty to raise our children according to time-tested principles that work. 

A Dishonest Trend

Ninety-seven percent of schoolchildren are dishonest according to statistics gathered by Vickie Abeles, who produced the documentary, Race to Nowhere.

Even without the statistics, it doesn't take a brain surgeon to figure out that we are no longer an honest society. 

My son recently took a statistics exam online only to receive an email from the teacher the following day, announcing that it was clear some of the students had cheated on the exam. The teacher had tracked their activity to see if they changed tabs to find the answers during the exam.

My son said the exam was easy, too, making it an even more pathetic situation. 

College students cheating on an easy exam?

I’m not upset that you lied to me, I’m upset that from now on I can’t believe you.
— Friedrich Nietzsche

What happened to the concept of hard work and honesty? In this case, they didn't even have to study hard, but they still felt the need to cheat. 

Cheating is a habit for many children today.

When the lines between honesty and dishonesty become so blurred that cheating on exams becomes all too common, we have a serious problem. Cheaters are cheaters. Liars are liars. School doesn't end; real life begin, and these students suddenly turn honest again. 

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They have become dishonest people. Their characters have formed this way because they are raised in a system that doesn't uphold the values of truth, goodness, and beauty; once so honored in the West.

In a Nutshell

Raise your children well, keep them out of public school, screen multi-media use when they are young (or eliminate it!), avoid inappropriate music, and surround them with natural beauty and good people.

If you do, you'll have accomplished something that is becoming more and more uncommon today; you’ll have raised decent children. That is, children who grow up with the ability to discern truth from falsehood, beauty from ugliness, and good from bad, and they’ll choose right more times than wrong.

Don’t miss our free download, Ten Books Every Well-Educated Child Should Read.

Raise an intelligent and decent child by joining the Smart Homeschooler Academy summer program and learn how to give your child an excellent education at home.

Join our waiting list for Elizabeth’s online course: Raise Your Child Well to Live a Life He Loves.

How to Raise a More Intelligent Child and an Excellent Reader—a free guide and book list with over 80+ carefully chosen titles.

Elizabeth Y. Hanson is an educator, veteran homeschooler and a Love and Leadership certified parenting coach with 17 years experience working in children’s education.

Using her unusual skill set, she has developed a comprehensive and unique understanding of how to raise and educate a child, and she devotes her time to help parents get it right.

Disclaimer: This is not a politically-correct blog.

5 Reasons Why You Will Love Homeschooling and Never Look Back

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Fear is the #1 reason that stops most parents from homeschooling.

Once you move beyond the fear, though, and decide to homeschool anyway because public school or online schools are no longer options for you, a whole new world emerges.

Most homeschooling parents then wonder why they waited so long to embrace the teaching of their own.

Here are four homeschooling perks that will make you fall in love with your new homeschooling lifestyle.

You Own Your Time

1. While the fear is that you'll lose your free time, what you don't realize is that you gain control over your time, you don't lose it. School no longer dictates what nights the kids need to be in bed early or when you can take your vacation or when your day ends and when it begins. These decisions are now yours to make.

If you have a family party to attend on a Sunday, you can stay as late as you like, maybe treat Monday like a Sunday and begin this particular week on a Tuesday instead. If you want to travel overseas for a vacation, but not pay prime rates for high season and deal with a deluge of other tourists, you can visit off-season and adjust your homeschool schedule to fit into your vacation time. 

Compound Perks

2. The compound perks that vacations offer is that you can turn any vacation into a homeschooling day of study. Think history, art, literature, and language arts. You are no longer restricted to the classroom for study, but travel can also become a hand's on way of learning.

If vacations are more than your budget can afford, weekly outings can fill the same role. 

As for your own free time, if you learn to manage your time and manage your children well, you should be able to replenish your energy reserves weekly. If you are going to homeschool, this is essential as the state of burn-out is real.

You avoid this by planning ahead and making sure you have enough time  to fill your reserves as needed. 

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Many parents today are more overwhelmed because their children run them ragged with their constant demands on their time. Parents no longer know how to establish clear boundaries with their children.

To homeschool successfully, you have to get the management of your family under control first.

Homeschooling is a job, but it isn't one that should leave you feeling exhausted. On the contrary, it should feel rewarding and fulfilling to you. If it doesn't, then something needs tweaking. 

3. Another significant stress in life that the act of homeschooling eliminates immediately is the battle parents and children endure every day regarding getting to public school, readjusting to coming home from public school, and the homework fiasco. 

All the stress these demands bring into your life melt away just like that.

Gone. 

Regarding homework, parents who help with homework are homeschooling, so why not just homeschool without all the extra pressure that comes with having your children in school?

4. Your children do not get graded and slotted into arbitrary categories of excellent, above average, average, and below average. They don't get ranked with their peers and made to feel better than they are or worse because there is no average with homeschooling. 

They don't develop false limitations about their academic ability, but they learn to do well and to excel in their studies. If they don't, you don't move them on until they do. You are a private tutor to your child when you homeschool, so you know when he knows the material and when he doesn't know it.

It's that simple.

You might do reviews with him, but you never need to test or grade him. He is competing with himself, and he naturally learns to do his best work. Sometimes, this may require a discipline tactic or two, but he is being trained in your home school to be his very best, including the work he produces.

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Grading, on the other hand, is for the classroom when a teacher has no idea where each of her 30 students is concerning what she has taught them. How can she be expected to know this without testing them?

And then come the grades with the boxes children get squeezed into that help to form their perception of who they are rather than who they can become. 

5. While your children may easily find friends in public school, you may not always approve of their friends, and you seldom know the family of their friends. If your child gets in with the wrong crowd, and there is no guarantee that he or she will not, you will watch your child be brought down by bad company, and there will be little you can do to stop it. 

With homeschooling, a prudent parent will choose good friends for their children, because the children are too young to know a good influence from a bad influence. When they get older, they'll have more discernment and be able to choose wisely for themselves.

As a homeschooling family, you'll make friends with other homeschooling families. You plan social events as a family, not as individuals.

Socializing as a family is the norm in so many other parts of the world, but in the West we've lost this habit that’s so vital to our family’s well-being. 

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Homeschooling is a lifestyle that puts the family back at the center again and allows us the time to build stable families with members who enjoy each other's company and are loyal to one another. 

Many homeschooling parents have told me that they felt a distance grown between them and their children once the children entered school.

Have you noticed this too?

My own mother said this about all of her children, and she had seven. It's par for the course, this social distancing, and it's impossible to avoid when children spend eight hours in school and then two to four hours doing homework in the evenings.

Your children are not with you for a large part of the day, and you don't share a social circle. When families were tighter, there was less segregation by age and more intermixing of entire families.

This mixing brings shared experiences and fond memories, which are the stuff bonds are made of.

After having gone through the public school system myself, and after homeschooling my now-grown children, I can honestly say that putting my children into public school for their elementary or middle-school years was never a serious consideration, ever. 

The homeschooling lifestyle was too good.

Don’t miss our free download, Ten Books Every Well-Educated Child Should Read.

Increase your child’s intelligence by joining the Smart Homeschooler Academy summer program to learn how to give your child an excellent education at home.

Join our waiting list for Elizabeth’s online course: Raise Your Child Well to Live a Life He Loves.

How to Raise a More Intelligent Child and an Excellent Reader—a free guide and book list with over 80+ carefully chosen titles.

Elizabeth Y. Hanson is an educator, veteran homeschooler and a Love and Leadership certified parenting coach with 17 years experience working in children’s education.

Using her unusual skill set, she has developed a comprehensive and unique understanding of how to raise and educate a child, and she devotes her time to help parents get it right.

Disclaimer: This is not a politically-correct blog.