A child growing up in a home where family meals are infrequent can lack a vital ingredient: a sense of well-being.
Read MoreTeach Your Children to Cook!
/In each home, around in the world, there is nothing more comforting than the smell of delightful aromas coming from the kitchen.
Yet, so many girls and boys are coming of age and do not know how to cook. What's more, young women seem to see it as a sign of their liberation.
Being dependent upon other people for food is not a sign of liberation; it's a sign that you don't know how to do something as fundamental as providing a home-cooked meal for yourself, nor for anyone else.
The irony is that children love to cook. Why are they coming-of-age bereft of this skill? Let's not dwell on the reasons here, but let's work quickly to fix the problem.
7 Easy Steps to Teach Your Child how to Cook
Step 1) Correct the Problem
It begins with you. If you're a mother who is not providing nourishing meals for her family, you must first learn to correct this.
(The variables of family are too numerous today to keep up with, hence, we'll take the less-complicated version: mom cooks and dad brings home the bread.)
YouTube is full of chefs dying to teach you how to cook. By studying two or three of their recipes, you will completely change the environment in your home and be cooking 5-star meals before you know it.
Now that your children have a role model to emulate, you can begin to teach little John and little Mary how to cook a meal or two.
Step 2) First Teach Them Only What Their Hands Can Do
In the beginning, you'll have them do things like shell peas and tear up lettuce for the salad. Before they are old enough to be responsible with a knife, you'll have them do any task that doesn't involve sharp items.
Step 3) Peeling Progression
Around the age of six, you can show them how to peel potatoes, carrots, cucumbers, and anything else you can think of. Let the peeling of anything become their domain.
By the way, these are not chores. Helping to prepare the food should be seen as fun time in the kitchen with mom (which means that you should NEVER complain about having to make dinner).
Step 4) Salad’s On
By the age of seven or eight, if not sooner, they should be able to prepare a salad on their own. Give your children the task of making the salad once or twice a week, or more often if you prefer.
Step 5) Carbs Galore
Next come the preparation and cooking of the rice and potatoes. This next step involves the stovetop, so they have to be old enough to handle a flame. If you have a gas top, the pressing concern here is that they are responsible and focused enough to remember to turn the flame all the way off.
If not, you should supervise them until they are. In the meantime, show your children how to rinse the rice. Next, show them how to measure the water, bring the rice to a boil, cover and let simmer for 20 minutes. There are tricks to making a perfect bowl of rice, so if you know these tricks (I don't), then be sure to include them.
Next, they can learn to make mashed potatoes. They peel, wash, and boil the potatoes. Drain the potatoes (you may have to help here, because the pan may be too heavy for them), add butter and milk and mash. If you don't like mashing potatoes, the good news is that children love it. You will never have to mash potatoes again.
Step 6) The Big Fish
Next, show them how to prepare the main dish. I recommend beginning with fish, which is less complicated to prepare. Show John and Jane how to wash the fish, put it in a baking dish, make the sauce, pour it over the fish, and cook it.
Step 7) Early Graduation
Once they complete all three of these steps successfully, you are now ready to grant your children the privilege of cooking an entire meal. They should be around nine or ten by this time (could be sooner!).
You now get to sit back, enjoy a cup of tea and some conversation with your spouse, and wait for what will soon be a delicious meal.
Moving forward, let your children take over the kitchen at least one night during the week to learn how to master the art of cooking and to give yourself a break.
By the time your children are 11 and 13, they should be able to handle an entire Thanksgiving dinner for ten people all by themselves.
I only know this because when my children were these ages, I was recovering from the flu and not up to cooking our annual Thanksgiving dinner.
I was lying in bed the day before Thanksgiving, and, while not contagious anymore, I was still exhausted. My intention was to call my guests that morning and let them know that I wouldn't be able to host the Thanksgiving dinner that year.
My daughter came in quietly and said in a low voice, Mom, do you think I could make the Thanksgiving dinner, so we don't have to cancel our party?"
"Do you think you can handle it?" I ask, quite frankly, incredulously.
"Yes," I'm sure I can."
"Then I think it's a fabulous idea!"
Truthfully, and I'm not the kind of mother who exaggerates her children's accomplishments, but it was one of the best Thanksgiving dinners ever.
The other point to mention is that, at their ages, it would never have occurred to me that they could handle a meal of this magnitude.
Homeschooled kids, I have found, are like this. Nothing is ever too big to tackle. By the time they reach the teens, if homeschooled well, they will know how to teach themselves just about anything one can learn, within reason.
One warning, though: while your children are capable of cooking a full meal long before they will be ready to move out, you don't want to give up your place in the kitchen for more than one or two nights a week.
There will never be anything as comforting as "mom" in the kitchen, whipping up a fabulous meal. No one can fill the shoes of your child's mother, ever.
They're your shoes to walk in; enjoy the journey.
Don’t miss your copy of: Top Ten YouTube Cooking Channels. With the download, you’ll also get a link to a great film about a famous chef that’s guaranteed to inspire you.
Join Elizabeth’s signature parenting course: Raise Your Child Well to live a life he loves.
Elizabeth Y. Hanson is a Love and Leadership certified parenting coach with 17 years experience working in children’s education.
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/Some mothers are very good about cooking daily meals for their families, especially if they have emigrated from foreign countries where family meals are still common, but American-born mothers have let this practice go more than we realize. I have been one of those moms.
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